Episode 93
EP #93 Cell phones, and the downfall of relationships!
Welcome back to Dont get this Twisted
The conversation explores the impact of phones on relationships, both personal and familial. The hosts discuss their personal experiences and fears of being exposed through their podcast. They highlight the negative effects of phones on communication, such as the loss of closeness and the inability to connect with others. The hosts also discuss the phenomenon of people being constantly on their phones, even in social settings like concerts. They emphasize the importance of human connection and the need to prioritize face-to-face interaction. The conversation concludes with a discussion on the negative effects of phones as babysitters and the importance of being present in relationships. This conversation explores the impact of phones and social media on personal relationships and society. The hosts discuss the importance of being present and engaged in conversations, as well as the negative effects of excessive phone use. They also touch on the decline of TV and the loss of interaction while watching. The conversation delves into the negative effects of blue light and social media on sleep, as well as the manipulation of social media platforms. The hosts emphasize the need for setting boundaries with phones and limiting screen time for children. They also discuss the dual nature of social media and the need for change in society's relationship with technology.
Explicit
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This podcast and website represent the opinions of Robb Courtney and Tina Garcia and their guests to the show and website. The content here should not be interpreted as medical advice or any other type of advice from any other type of licensed professional. The content here is for informational purposes only, and because each person is so unique, please consult your healthcare or other applicable licensed professional with any medical or other related questions. Views and opinions expressed in the podcast and website are our own and do not represent that of our places of work. While we make every effort to ensure that the information, we are sharing is accurate, we welcome any comments, suggestions, or correction of errors. Privacy is of the utmost importance to us. All people, places, and scenarios mentioned in the podcast have been changed to protect confidentiality. This website or podcast should not be used in any legal capacity whatsoever, including but not limited to establishing “standard of care” in a legal sense or as a basis for expert witness testimony related to the medical profession or any other licensed profession. No guarantee is given regarding the accuracy of any statements or opinions made on the podcast or website. In no way does listening, reading, emailing, or interacting on social media with our content establish a doctor-patient relationship or relationship with any other type of licensed professional. Robb Courtney and Tina Garcia do not receive any money from any pharmaceutical industry for topics covered pertaining to medicine or medical in nature. If you find any errors in any of the content of this podcast, website, or blogs, please send a message through the “contact” page or email DGTTwisted@gmail.com. This podcast is owned by "Don’t Get This Twisted,” Robb Courtney.
Transcript
1
::[Robb]: And welcome to another show of Don't
Get This Twisted. I am Rob, along with my co-host
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::[Robb]: as always, Tina. How are you doing?
3
::[Tina m Garcia]: I've been going crazy trying
to figure out how I'm gonna plan all the things
4
::[Tina m Garcia]: going on in my life, but other
than that, I'm doing quite well.
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::[Robb]: That's
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::[Tina m Garcia]: How are you?
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::[Robb]: always a plus. Ah, you know, a little
of this and a little of that.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Yeah.
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::[Robb]: My life is always a roller coaster.
10
::[Tina m Garcia]: Isn't life normally like that?
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::[Robb]: Yeah, it's like living at Disneyland.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Yeah. I, um, okay. So we did
the polyamory, um, podcast
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::[Robb]: Hmm.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: and that for me, I was really
afraid of, because like I said, in the podcast,
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::[Tina m Garcia]: I kept everything very secretive
and, um, the one person, well, there was several,
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::[Tina m Garcia]: but most of the men in my life
from my brother, my dad, to my ex, to anybody
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::[Tina m Garcia]: I've dated, nobody listens
to the podcast. Everything.
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::[Robb]: Well, that's good.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Um, yeah, probably is.
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::[Robb]: Mm-hmm.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: But, um, I was, I was very
worried about my, my, uh, my other mother hearing
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::[Tina m Garcia]: the podcast and I went to a
party on Saturday and. This is a week ago,
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::[Tina m Garcia]: and I found out from her son
that she listened to the episode, because he
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::[Tina m Garcia]: told her to, which
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::[Robb]: Of course.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: I was like, oh my God, you
threw me under a bus. But, you know, my, one
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::[Tina m Garcia]: of my biggest fears is, is
being exposed and people see
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::[Robb]: Sure.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: stupid shit that I've done.
And it, it sparked a very good conversation
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::[Tina m Garcia]: between, uh, me and my second
mom. And, uh, she was very sweet about the
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::[Tina m Garcia]: whole thing. And. she had some
questions and I answered them as truthfully
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::[Tina m Garcia]: as is I could and um yeah it
worked out okay so I guess the moral of the
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::[Tina m Garcia]: story is don't be so afraid
of the truth coming out because it's just the
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::[Tina m Garcia]: truth and you just got to deal
with what is
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::[Robb]: I agree.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: so yeah.
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::[Robb]: I don't pull any punches on here, so
whoever listens, they
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::[Tina m Garcia]: I gotta
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::[Robb]: just
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::[Tina m Garcia]: tell
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::[Robb]: know they're
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::[Tina m Garcia]: you,
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::[Robb]: getting it.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: nobody really wants to know
how real things could be with me. I don't think
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::[Tina m Garcia]: like I do stupid shit. I'm
not going to lie, but I also I'm pretty smart
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::[Tina m Garcia]: about it. And I, I will hold
my own with what I've done. It's not like I'll
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::[Tina m Garcia]: just do something I don't believe
in, but still there's that little kid inside
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::[Tina m Garcia]: that doesn't want mom to find
out or doesn't want to be exposed, you know,
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::[Tina m Garcia]: or be wrong. And, and man,
people don't like me already because of who
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::[Tina m Garcia]: I am and how I act and what
I do. And I don't see myself as being wild,
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::[Tina m Garcia]: but I am bold and I will do
whatever the hell I want to do. And I make
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::[Tina m Garcia]: no excuses for my action. I'll
just be like, yeah, that was me. So for me,
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::[Tina m Garcia]: I always feel like I'm under
a microscope. Especially doing the podcast.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: That's why I didn't even promote
this to my family that, you know, like there's
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::[Tina m Garcia]: so many people that don't know.
And then there's other people that I don't
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::[Tina m Garcia]: even know how they know just
through talking, but, um, so far what I'm getting
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::[Tina m Garcia]: from the people that I have
led in to listen to this is that they, that
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::[Tina m Garcia]: they like that we're real and
that I am the way I am here or, uh, in real
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::[Tina m Garcia]: life. So. I'm just gonna keep
going with that, but man was that... I was
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::[Tina m Garcia]: like, oh no. It
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::[Robb]: Yeah,
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::[Tina m Garcia]: was a lot. Ha ha ha.
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::[Robb]: there were a few people who I was not
hesitant, just I knew that they would know
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::[Robb]: I was talking about them.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Yeah.
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::[Robb]: But you know, like I'm a straight shooter.
I don't hold anything back. And most of the
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::[Robb]: people who would hear something about
them, they already know pretty much everything.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Right?
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::[Robb]: It's just a matter of luck. That's why
we don't name names. It's easier to get
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm.
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::[Robb]: that going.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Yeah.
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::[Robb]: So,
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Before
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::[Robb]: like
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::[Tina m Garcia]: we
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::[Robb]: always,
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::[Tina m Garcia]: get started,
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::[Robb]: like always,
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::[Tina m Garcia]: check out our socials.
81
::[Robb]: check out our socials. Do all that fun
stuff. Facebook, Instagram, Twitter. And go
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::[Robb]: to wherever you listen to podcasts.
Apple, Google, Spotify, Amazon. pretty much
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::[Robb]: everywhere that you can hear podcasts
and follow so you get to shows every Wednesday.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Yeah,
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::[Robb]: So this
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::[Tina m Garcia]: do
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::[Robb]: week,
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::[Tina m Garcia]: that.
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::[Robb]: we were chatting around this last week
before coming up with ideas for the month of
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::[Robb]: May. And you brought up a really good
one that I think that we probably should have
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::[Robb]: done a while ago because I think it's
pretty important that what having a phone in
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::[Robb]: your hand has done to relationships,
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Mmm.
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::[Robb]: both family and personal relationships.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
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::[Robb]: I think that it's, I see it more and
more now when you're out and about. Phones
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::[Robb]: have taken away any kind of closeness
that families used to have about talking with
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::[Robb]: each other at a table or
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
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::[Robb]: boyfriend and girlfriend. I've seen
couples that I'm not sure they're on dates
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::[Robb]: but are at least out to eat that literally
are sitting across from each other on their
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::[Robb]: phones.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Yeah. Oh yeah.
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::[Robb]: And with families, I think it's worse.
Like mostly younger kids where you see them,
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::[Robb]: they just have an iPad standing in front
of them.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm
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::[Robb]: And
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::[Tina m Garcia]: at all times
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::[Robb]: the whole time while they're eating,
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Yeah
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::[Robb]: it's bizarre. And I think both sides
of it, both the family side and the relationship
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::[Robb]: side are two totally different evils
that come with having a phone
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
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::[Robb]: in your hand all the time. See, we come
from the generation of having a cellphone that
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::[Robb]: was only used for talking.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Well, we also come from a time
where we had to sit at the table to eat dinner.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: We had our grandparents showing
up at all, you know, at least in
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::[Robb]: Right.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: my world, always had grandparents
around, always had aunts, uncles, cousins.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Um, you know, and another thing
is we had to pick up a phone that was stuck
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::[Tina m Garcia]: in the kitchen on a long cord
to talk to somebody. There's no way you could
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::[Tina m Garcia]: cheat or
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::[Robb]: Right.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: say something secretive because
everybody in the house is going to hear it.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: You're in the main room.
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::[Robb]: Mm-hmm.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: of the house. I remember getting
off the phone with my parents so many times
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::[Tina m Garcia]: going, wait, where did you
say you were going to go? And who are you going
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::[Tina m Garcia]: with? And I'm like, damn, can
I get some privacy?
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::[Robb]: Right.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: You know, so we didn't have,
we didn't have a way of communicating, a way
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::[Tina m Garcia]: of, of having one-on-one communication
in any way that, that other people didn't have
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::[Tina m Garcia]: some sort of access to because
they were there, you know?
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::[Robb]: Well,
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Ahem.
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::[Robb]: and look, cell phones are great for
knowledge. I don't wanna take them totally
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::[Robb]: away, because if you need to know something,
or now with maps and other things, there's
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::[Robb]: definitely apps that are great for society.
Social media
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
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::[Robb]: has made us dumber, and way more likely
to use that for bad.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
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::[Robb]: And I will tell you that it's, I've
done it, so I know. Social media can get you
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::[Robb]: in contact with people that you haven't
been in contact with for years and get you
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::[Robb]: in tons of trouble.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
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::[Robb]: And then it's just, why are you on the
phone all the time? Why are you on the phone
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::[Robb]: all the time? Why are you on the phone
all the time? It'll lead to just turmoil. I
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::[Robb]: went out. and had drinks and dinner,
I don't know, a few weeks ago with a friend
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::[Robb]: of mine, and right here in town, it
was her and a friend of hers. I got there and
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::[Robb]: I will say, and we were there, I was
there hours, I will tell you that each one
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::[Robb]: of the people picked up their cell phones
maybe twice.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Nice.
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::[Robb]: It was awesome. It was... it was nothing
but talking, and it was more like how things
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::[Robb]: should be. Nobody
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
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::[Robb]: was worried about, you know, who's doing
what or what's next, or texting or checking.
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::[Robb]: It's like, no, our phones were on the
table, and like, two of us, me and my friend,
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::[Robb]: I know have children. So that's her
biggest thing, is to make sure that she can
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::[Robb]: get, you know, her children are trying
to get ahold of her. And me the same way, if
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::[Robb]: I need my son to get ahold of me, I
want him to be able to do it. And I believe
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::[Robb]: the girl who was there, my friend's
friend, also had kids, so that would be the
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::[Robb]: same. But that was it, and it was nothing
but conversation, but I can tell you the people
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::[Robb]: around us, all of them had phones and
were looking at them the whole time.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
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::[Robb]: So it's just a very bizarre thing, and
maybe it's a generational thing. I do believe
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::[Robb]: that our generation, has got caught
up in all of that because we
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Of
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::[Robb]: were
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::[Tina m Garcia]: course.
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::[Robb]: kind of the first internet, like we
were the first 20 year olds to have internet.
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::[Robb]: So we're part of that, but it's just
weird. And to
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::[Tina m Garcia]: But
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::[Robb]: see families.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: we also had a social connection
that was a staple in all of our worlds. Like
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::[Tina m Garcia]: we were teenagers before there
were cameras in everybody's hands. Thank God.
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::[Robb]: Thank goodness.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: We didn't have, I mean, people
had to tell me how to get to their house by
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::[Tina m Garcia]: using landmarks because I have
the worst sense of direction. And You know,
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::[Tina m Garcia]: I kind of enjoyed that. I knew
what was around more than I do now, because
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::[Tina m Garcia]: now I just put, plug it into
my phone and it says,
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::[Robb]: Mm-hmm.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: turn right here and 150 feet.
You're good.
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::[Robb]: Right.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: You know? So I miss the fact
that we can't do everything that we used to
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::[Tina m Garcia]: do without somebody getting
it on video or getting
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::[Robb]: Mm-hmm.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: it in pictures or, but then
I also liked the fact that everywhere we go,
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::[Tina m Garcia]: my friends are like, let's
take a picture real quick, you know? Cause
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::[Tina m Garcia]: when when, God forbid, one
of us is gone, we all have pictures
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::[Robb]: Mm
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::[Tina m Garcia]: of fun things that we did,
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::[Robb]: hmm.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: you
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::[Robb]: Sure.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: know? But it's, so that part
of it is good. And I like that I could connect
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::[Tina m Garcia]: with people that are far away.
I have family in Pittsburgh that I don't ever
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::[Tina m Garcia]: get to see or talk to, but
we communicate through social media.
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::[Robb]: Mm-hmm.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: I enjoy that. But I can't stand
going to a restaurant. and my niece and my
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::[Tina m Garcia]: nephew are on their phone the
whole time and I'm trying to talk to them.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: They're not good at communicating.
They don't talk like I do.
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::[Robb]: Mm-hmm.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: I don't like that I have a
hard time connecting with them. I have to force
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::[Tina m Garcia]: them to talk to me and trust
me, I do. I'm that aunt that goes, hey, you
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::[Tina m Garcia]: guys got me for about an hour.
You want to spend some time or are you going
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::[Tina m Garcia]: to sit on your phones all day?
Because if you're going to sit on your phones,
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::[Tina m Garcia]: I'll just leave. And then they're
like, okay, okay, okay.
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::[Robb]: Right.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: But. I shouldn't have to do
that, you know? But that's where we're going.
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::[Robb]: I mean, we're there.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Yeah.
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::[Robb]: I mean, look, my kid, he can communicate.
He's a good talker, thank goodness. But I know
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::[Robb]: that being around him and his friends,
they're phone checkers for sure because there's
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::[Robb]: so many messages coming through. They
communicate with so many people.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Yeah.
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::[Robb]: So I also think that that's better for
our generation is that we have obviously a
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::[Robb]: much smaller friend group. that we communicate
with a lot. These kids, I mean, they have 20,
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::[Robb]: 30, 40 text message going at the same
time. I couldn't even fathom remembering who
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::[Robb]: I'm talking to.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: I'm going to go to bed.
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::[Robb]: So I think it is a generational thing.
And they do things different, there's no doubt.
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::[Robb]: But I think we have smartphones that
are making us dumber. Like you said,
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::[Tina m Garcia]: I agree with
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::[Robb]: maps
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::[Tina m Garcia]: that.
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::[Robb]: are great, but no one remembers how
to get anywhere.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm. They don't have to.
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::[Robb]: Most people don't even know people's
phone numbers anymore.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm. That's true and I used
to know everybody's numbers.
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::[Robb]: Everybody's
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
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::[Robb]: number. Or everybody's number who was
super important in your life.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: No, I remembered every number.
It was crazy how I could do that.
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::[Robb]: I can't tell you what my kid's number
is.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Really?
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::[Robb]: I have no idea.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: I don't talk to my kids so
I don't know hers either.
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::[Robb]: But I mean, I don't have to worry about
it. I have it
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Yeah.
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::[Robb]: as a favorite. I just press a button
and it calls him. Or presses
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
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::[Robb]: a button and it goes through our text
stream. So. So the important people in our
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::[Robb]: life, we really don't know their phone
numbers anymore because it's making us not
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::[Robb]: have to remember. So
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Right.
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::[Robb]: again, smartphones do make us a tad
dumber because we don't have to think anymore.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: not only that but i think for
kids they don't have to interact anymore they
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::[Robb]: Mm-hmm.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: don't have to interact in person
they're great on a computer they will text
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::[Tina m Garcia]: all day long to whomever they're
talking to but they don't my nephew prime example
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::[Tina m Garcia]: he is on his phone all the
time he's got a girlfriend she takes up a lot
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::[Tina m Garcia]: of time and um they're constantly
going back and forth on their phone. I can't
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::[Tina m Garcia]: get him to talk to me. I can't
get him to get up and come to the dinner table
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::[Tina m Garcia]: when it's time to eat. Like
it's hard and I always tell him, put your phone
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::[Tina m Garcia]: down and talk to me. Like,
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::[Robb]: Mm-hmm.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: let's get together. I wanna
know more about you. And it's so hard. And
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::[Tina m Garcia]: my brother allows it. You know,
he's a teenager. My brother's not gonna say
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::[Tina m Garcia]: too much. He's 17, but. They
he doesn't know how to interact. Our family
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::[Tina m Garcia]: is a bunch of huggers and kissers.
And, and I always say they give me their head,
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::[Tina m Garcia]: like they just put their head
into my shoulder and, and I'm supposed to hug
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::[Tina m Garcia]: them sort of, cause they don't
get close enough
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::[Robb]: Right.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: and, and that's their way of
saying hi. And I'm like, you can't even hug
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::[Tina m Garcia]: me. Come on
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::[Robb]: Right.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: now. But I see the kids are
like that all the way around. Like it's very
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::[Tina m Garcia]: hard for kids to open up and
be able to connect with their people because.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: They don't have to do it anymore.
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::[Robb]: Yeah, I agree with that. I think it's
a weird thing. My kid is a little different
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::[Robb]: for a lot of different reasons, but
like he grew up in a wrestling locker room.
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::[Robb]: So
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
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::[Robb]: wrestlers shake hands and hug each other.
So like my kid
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Right.
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::[Robb]: has been doing that for years. So he
kind of continued that trend with his friends
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::[Robb]: when we lived in Camarillo. So when
he sees them now, he like shakes hands with
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::[Robb]: them and brings them in and like they
all hug each other. And I do the same. And
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::[Robb]: it's funny, my friend who lives here,
down the street, her son is a big human being.
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::[Robb]: He's a very large,
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Hmm
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::[Robb]: he'll be 21, so he's almost a man, or
is a man. He's very quiet. He talks with my
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::[Robb]: kid. When we're together, I make him
try to talk. And he's a good kid, and he really
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::[Robb]: is. He has had some issues. but thankfully
he's cleared all those up and he's kind of
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::[Robb]: going in a right direction. But you're
right, the communication skills are so odd
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::[Robb]: because his mom can communicate. She's
a little quiet at some times, but can generally
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::[Robb]: talk. But when the kids get together,
they talk. So it's kind of this weird thing
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::[Robb]: where communicating with adults is just
a whole. other issue as well, and mostly with
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::[Robb]: that generation, because they're used
to being on a typewriter and
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
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::[Robb]: texting. So when I text my friend's
kid, he's all up for brrrrr, he'll text me
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::[Robb]: back and tell me what's going on. I
did have him call me the other day, because
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::[Robb]: he was going to go do something, and
I said, hey, when you find out the news, give
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::[Robb]: me a call back. And he called me, gave
me the news and everything. So... I just hope
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::[Robb]: that this generation understands that
they're limiting themselves to having very
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::[Robb]: good communication skills.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: And human contact. Human contact,
like I don't understand why. All these kids,
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::[Tina m Garcia]: this is what I hear now. Oh,
that's my friend. Well, yeah, I never met your
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::[Tina m Garcia]: friend. Where do they live?
Like, let's go, we'll go to the movies with
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::[Tina m Garcia]: them. Oh, they
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::[Robb]: Oh, yeah.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: live in another state. They're
not your friend. You never met them.
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::[Robb]: Right.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: You don't have any, you're
just talking to some crazy person on the other
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::[Tina m Garcia]: line. You don't even know who
they are.
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::[Robb]: They're
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::[Tina m Garcia]: Like.
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::[Robb]: a colleague.
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::[Tina m Garcia]: There's something, I don't
even know what you would call it, but I think
310
::[Tina m Garcia]: about that all the time going,
you don't even know who you're talking to,
311
::[Robb]: I
312
::[Tina m Garcia]: what
313
::[Robb]: mean,
314
::[Tina m Garcia]: the hell?
315
::[Robb]: yes and no. I think with video games,
a lot of these kids have cameras, headphones,
316
::[Robb]: they talk to each other every day. I'll
go into my kid's room and there's a thing called
317
::[Robb]: Discord, which is kind of like a, think
of a modern chat room is
318
::[Tina m Garcia]: Okay.
319
::[Robb]: what I think it is, is the best way
of explaining it. But in some of these, they
320
::[Robb]: have cameras and they're hanging out
with each other. he'll have like five to eight
321
::[Robb]: cameras with people that are talking
with him all the time. And he sees them and
322
::[Robb]: talks to them just like we do when we
do the show. So you're right, I don't think
323
::[Robb]: that they're friends on the level that
we had friends,
324
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
325
::[Robb]: because we had friends that we would
go out and hit the pavement with and skateboard
326
::[Robb]: with.
327
::[Tina m Garcia]: teepee houses and... you
328
::[Robb]: Yeah, whatever
329
::[Tina m Garcia]: know...
330
::[Robb]: it is, yeah, whatever nonsense we were
doing. We didn't have a phone strapped to us
331
::[Robb]: to make
332
::[Tina m Garcia]: Yeah,
333
::[Robb]: us.
334
::[Tina m Garcia]: we had to get on our bikes,
ride down
335
::[Robb]: Mm-hmm.
336
::[Tina m Garcia]: to wherever our friends lived,
or get on our skateboards or,
337
::[Robb]: Yeah.
338
::[Tina m Garcia]: you know, we would show up,
my brother's friends would show up so stinking
339
::[Tina m Garcia]: early because if you didn't
get in early, like you may
340
::[Robb]: Oh yeah.
341
::[Tina m Garcia]: not see anybody all day. You
know what I mean? It was,
342
::[Robb]: Yeah.
343
::[Tina m Garcia]: we were
344
::[Robb]: You might,
345
::[Tina m Garcia]: all gone.
346
::[Robb]: well because, yeah, because once he
left, there was
347
::[Tina m Garcia]: Yeah,
348
::[Robb]: no calling.
349
::[Tina m Garcia]: yeah, right.
350
::[Robb]: There wasn't.
351
::[Tina m Garcia]: Oh my gosh, or you get a busy
signal and
352
::[Robb]: Ah, yeah.
353
::[Tina m Garcia]: for hours, like who in the
hell's on the phone for hours that we can't
354
::[Tina m Garcia]: get through? Yeah.
355
::[Robb]: Yep. So, and again, that's the double-edged
sword of what a cell phone is now.
356
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
357
::[Robb]: Look, they're definitely great for getting
a message to somebody quickly when you really
358
::[Robb]: need to. It's
359
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
360
::[Robb]: an amazing thing. The text message has
definitely changed how we do things. You know,
361
::[Robb]: and that was a government thing. Did
you know that the text message was well before
362
::[Robb]: it came out on... a modern cell phone
for us in the public, the government had been
363
::[Robb]: doing it for years. Yeah, so,
364
::[Tina m Garcia]: Hmm.
365
::[Robb]: yeah,
366
::[Tina m Garcia]: Didn't know that.
367
::[Robb]: and obviously they found a way to have
a network that would do it. But, so I like
368
::[Robb]: that part about it. If I wanna text
my friend down the street, I can text her.
369
::[Robb]: If I wanna text you and say, hey, this
is what I wanna do for the show, it's instantaneous.
370
::[Tina m Garcia]: And we check in all the time.
371
::[Robb]: Yeah,
372
::[Tina m Garcia]: There's no rhyme or reason
to it.
373
::[Robb]: right, and it's great because we might
come up with some oddball idea
374
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
375
::[Robb]: and we can throw it into our, into our
phone notes because that's another thing that
376
::[Robb]: is great. So you're right, like cameras
are amazing because you can catch something
377
::[Robb]: that, you know, you might not have been
able to before. But here's the flip side to
378
::[Robb]: that as well. You know, go to a concert
now and how many people are holding up their
379
::[Robb]: cell phone instead of watching
380
::[Tina m Garcia]: Oh,
381
::[Robb]: the show.
382
::[Tina m Garcia]: yeah, I'm sick of that. Cause
then I can't see around them cause they
383
::[Robb]: Mm-hmm.
384
::[Tina m Garcia]: all got their hands up with
their cell phones. Yeah, I don't, I don't.
385
::[Tina m Garcia]: And who wants to hear the song
or hear the band in that quality? That's what
386
::[Tina m Garcia]: I'm like, why are you doing
that? Like take
387
::[Robb]: I
388
::[Tina m Garcia]: your
389
::[Robb]: just.
390
::[Tina m Garcia]: pictures, do what you gotta
do, but listen to the music, don't try to record
391
::[Tina m Garcia]: it.
392
::[Robb]: I just think you're missing the point
of a live show.
393
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm.
394
::[Robb]: The whole point of a live show is that
you were there watching
395
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
396
::[Robb]: and interacting with the band or whatever.
And look, maybe that's just the old Foggy and
397
::[Robb]: me and I'm like, you know, but I just
think that we're missing out on things by trying
398
::[Robb]: to catch the things we think we're missing
out on. So.
399
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm. You know what drives
me crazy? A couple weeks ago I had a client
400
::[Tina m Garcia]: bring her her son in and her
son's about a year year and a couple months
401
::[Tina m Garcia]: old I don't know and she brought
in the iPad with him like he's not even talking
402
::[Tina m Garcia]: really yet and He was on that
iPad Almost the whole time That I was doing
403
::[Tina m Garcia]: her hair. She's got a two and
a half hour appointment and that's that's conservative
404
::[Robb]: Mm-hmm.
405
::[Tina m Garcia]: And she just sits him in there
and thinks that he's going to be okay for two
406
::[Tina m Garcia]: and a half hours. Like she'll
give him some snacks, which are crappy. Like
407
::[Tina m Garcia]: she's in the people don't feed
their kids good snacks anymore that I've seen
408
::[Tina m Garcia]: lately. And I know they do,
but I'm just saying what I've seen lately,
409
::[Tina m Garcia]: giving a kid a bag of Cheetos
and his tablet so that he can watch whatever
410
::[Tina m Garcia]: he wants. It drove me crazy.
So every time I wasn't doing her hair, I picked
411
::[Tina m Garcia]: him up and I was talking to
him and playing with them and rough housing.
412
::[Tina m Garcia]: And. and doing everything and
she said, well, don't do that. Cause he won't
413
::[Tina m Garcia]: want to get back in his stroller.
I'm like, that's the point.
414
::[Robb]: Right.
415
::[Tina m Garcia]: You don't want this kid to
want to be alone. You want him to be with people.
416
::[Tina m Garcia]: You want him to, to socialize.
And I took him outside. I did all kinds of
417
::[Tina m Garcia]: things with him. She said,
I, she said, I spoiled the hell out of them,
418
::[Tina m Garcia]: but, and I didn't, I interacted
with them, which is what you're supposed to
419
::[Tina m Garcia]: do. Like read to your child,
talk to your child, sing. There's even commercials
420
::[Tina m Garcia]: about it. Like.
421
::[Robb]: Mm-hmm.
422
::[Tina m Garcia]: Why do you think that it's
okay for this electronic device to do all that?
423
::[Tina m Garcia]: That's your greatest gift you're
losing by not being a part of your child at
424
::[Tina m Garcia]: that age too. It's
425
::[Robb]: Yeah.
426
::[Tina m Garcia]: insane that people do that.
427
::[Robb]: Well, it's the electric babysitter.
428
::[Tina m Garcia]: I hate it. I hate
429
::[Robb]: Yeah.
430
::[Tina m Garcia]: it. Cause I'm the one that
likes to play games and act foolish and, and
431
::[Tina m Garcia]: hang out. And, you know, I
don't know when, when kids are around, I find
432
::[Tina m Garcia]: myself on the floor with them,
you know, doing wrestling and, and being, you
433
::[Tina m Garcia]: know, the human contact that
kids need. That's like one of my specialties.
434
::[Tina m Garcia]: I love when you get it, like
a little kid that's a little pain in the ass.
435
::[Tina m Garcia]: And it's because he's craving
attention, you know, so you run them, you play
436
::[Tina m Garcia]: with them. You. You do whatever
you got to do, but at the end, like you've
437
::[Tina m Garcia]: got a good kid, cause he'll
listen to you and respect you. And he wants
438
::[Tina m Garcia]: to do whatever it is you're
doing. So you have all the control you need,
439
::[Tina m Garcia]: but I don't think people really
think that.
440
::[Robb]: No, well, because it's much easier to
hand them a phone.
441
::[Tina m Garcia]: That's
442
::[Robb]: Or,
443
::[Tina m Garcia]: not any more fun.
444
::[Robb]: no, well, it's not, but it's no difference
than us sitting at a table and everyone's on
445
::[Robb]: their phones.
446
::[Tina m Garcia]: You know, my friends, they're
not big on that though. I mean,
447
::[Robb]: No,
448
::[Tina m Garcia]: even
449
::[Robb]: but...
450
::[Tina m Garcia]: when you and I get together,
we may pick up our phone once, check it real
451
::[Tina m Garcia]: quick, put it down, and then
we're talking.
452
::[Robb]: Sure, but
453
::[Tina m Garcia]: I
454
::[Robb]: I
455
::[Tina m Garcia]: kinda
456
::[Robb]: think
457
::[Tina m Garcia]: did that with all my friends.
458
::[Robb]: that I do as well. I don't need to be
on my phone. My phone is, if I'm with people,
459
::[Robb]: it's a way to get in contact with people
for whatever reason is necessary at the time.
460
::[Robb]: But I mean, I see people, again, couples,
that are out to dinner, sitting across from
461
::[Robb]: each other, on their phone. Like
462
::[Tina m Garcia]: and they
463
::[Robb]: doing...
464
::[Tina m Garcia]: look miserable.
465
::[Robb]: Yeah, doing things on their phone, like
466
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
467
::[Robb]: either on a game or checking social
media. Or it's like, no, I can't do that. I
468
::[Robb]: need attention. If I'm there, you better
be attentive. And vice versa, if I'm not being
469
::[Robb]: attentive, say something. Let's not
dehumanize each other anymore. Because
470
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
471
::[Robb]: that's what the cell phone is doing.
And it's doing it to... Relationships, families,
472
::[Robb]: it's even weirder, because we talked
about it before where young kids don't know
473
::[Robb]: their grandparents. Because when grandpa
and grandma come over to visit their children,
474
::[Robb]: the grandchildren are just in the corner
on their phone. I have to, and look, my son
475
::[Robb]: was just as guilty. I tell him, get
off your phone. Like, communicate, because
476
::[Robb]: your grandparents won't be here very
long. At some point, they're gonna be gone.
477
::[Robb]: So you have to... you have to be in
the conversation.
478
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
479
::[Robb]: And I think that's gonna help along
the way when you're out on a date and you have
480
::[Robb]: to be in the conversation. You can't
be on your phone if you're going on a date.
481
::[Robb]: To me, that would be the, as I will
check out, I'll be like, okay, well, let's
482
::[Robb]: finish eating so I can go home. Because
if you're not talking with me, it's gonna be
483
::[Robb]: bad. I'm just too talkative now.
484
::[Tina m Garcia]: Yeah. And I've always been
a talker. I force people to talk to me anyway.
485
::[Tina m Garcia]: So I'm like, please put your
phones down.
486
::[Robb]: Beer.
487
::[Tina m Garcia]: I want to know you not whatever
is going on in your phone. I want to know you,
488
::[Tina m Garcia]: you know, let's let's shoot
the shit. Let's have some fun. Let's say I
489
::[Tina m Garcia]: don't care if you say inappropriate
things the whole time. I don't care. I'm as
490
::[Tina m Garcia]: a matter of fact, I prefer
it. So
491
::[Robb]: Yeah, me too.
492
::[Tina m Garcia]: You know, if you got a dirty
joke, I want to hear it. If you've got like,
493
::[Tina m Garcia]: you know, something going on
in your life, I want to know about it, if you're
494
::[Tina m Garcia]: having problems, tell me
495
::[Robb]: Right.
496
::[Tina m Garcia]: there, there never needs to
be a reason why we shouldn't open up to people
497
::[Tina m Garcia]: that we're close to. And it's
even with my niece and nephew. My dad says
498
::[Tina m Garcia]: all the time, he goes, I just
want to love my kids and my grandkids. And
499
::[Tina m Garcia]: it's so hard to get them to
talk to me. It's so hard to get any emotion
500
::[Tina m Garcia]: or any. any affection out of
them. He goes, you guys were not like that.
501
::[Tina m Garcia]: And I said, yeah, but we were
also taught when you walk into a house, you
502
::[Tina m Garcia]: gotta hug and kiss everybody.
So start on whichever side, go clear around
503
::[Tina m Garcia]: the room, say hi to everybody.
And
504
::[Robb]: Mm-hmm.
505
::[Tina m Garcia]: then you could do whatever
the hell you wanted. You could go outside and
506
::[Tina m Garcia]: play with your cousins. You
could go in the room, play your video games,
507
::[Tina m Garcia]: do whatever you gotta do, but
you have to say hello. And then another goodbye.
508
::[Tina m Garcia]: We called it the Garcia goodbye
because it took like an hour to get through
509
::[Tina m Garcia]: everybody because we don't
have a small family. And you know, and then
510
::[Tina m Garcia]: sometimes the only time that
you're talking to somebody is when you're saying
511
::[Tina m Garcia]: hello or goodbye. So
512
::[Robb]: Mm-hmm.
513
::[Tina m Garcia]: that could take forever. But
you know what the thing is, is because of that
514
::[Tina m Garcia]: now that my mom is gone, I'm
the one that everybody calls for everything.
515
::[Tina m Garcia]: So it worked, you know, because
I am close to people. They call me, they talk
516
::[Tina m Garcia]: to me, they they interact with
me and I force the kids. So the kids now do
517
::[Tina m Garcia]: it with me too, as much as.
is I make them, but I still am like, no, we're
518
::[Tina m Garcia]: not doing this. Get up and
give me a hug. Like this, what if this is the
519
::[Tina m Garcia]: last time I ever get to hug
you? What if
520
::[Robb]: Mm-hmm.
521
::[Tina m Garcia]: I get in a car accident and
I'm not here anymore? Well, same thing with
522
::[Tina m Garcia]: you, you know, like, don't
you want the last thing to be something good
523
::[Robb]: Mm-hmm.
524
::[Tina m Garcia]: and to know that you're loved?
525
::[Robb]: For sure.
526
::[Tina m Garcia]: I, I tell my clients, I tell
my friends, I tell people all the time because.
527
::[Tina m Garcia]: It really is bothering me.
And, and I would say in the beginning when.
528
::[Tina m Garcia]: when I had my daughter and
phones got to the point where they were, you
529
::[Tina m Garcia]: know, where we were on our,
our text messages and everything all the time.
530
::[Tina m Garcia]: I, I was even guilty of doing
this at times, but I also spent a lot of time
531
::[Tina m Garcia]: with my kid. I put her on the
counter and made her read to me every night,
532
::[Tina m Garcia]: you know, while I was
533
::[Robb]: Mm-hmm.
534
::[Tina m Garcia]: making dinner, I played games
with the kids. I played games with the kids
535
::[Tina m Garcia]: till they play them just like
me. We did it so much. So I, I, I get how easy
536
::[Tina m Garcia]: it is to
537
::[Tina m Garcia]: let something else do the work
so that you could get what you need to get
538
::[Tina m Garcia]: done,
539
::[Robb]: Mm-hmm.
540
::[Tina m Garcia]: but at the same time it's not
work. You're missing opportunities to be
541
::[Robb]: Sure,
542
::[Tina m Garcia]: close.
543
::[Robb]: yeah, and I think that's the same along
the bend of anytime you're on your phone. Like
544
::[Robb]: I said, if
545
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
546
::[Robb]: you're with your friends out, the last
thing you should do is be on your phone. The
547
::[Robb]: last thing. I mean, I love the idea
of stacking the phones on the table. We're
548
::[Robb]: here to talk, we're here to communicate,
we're here to see each other. And it's no different
549
::[Robb]: than if you're in the same living room.
If you're in the same living room with your
550
::[Robb]: mate and you're both on a phone and
sitting far away from each other, there's a
551
::[Robb]: huge problem, huge problem to me. That
you should, that should be the last thing you
552
::[Robb]: should ever do. And I mean the very,
very last. You should be both napping on the
553
::[Robb]: couch away from each other before you
are on a phone with each other, because it
554
::[Robb]: just leads to nonsense and it leads
to bad things happening.
555
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
556
::[Robb]: And the very small thing of communication.
Look, we mostly all sleep with a phone at our
557
::[Robb]: bedside. because most of us use it for
an alarm.
558
::[Tina m Garcia]: We use it for everything.
559
::[Robb]: But if you're getting in bed together
and you guys are on your phone's issue, that
560
::[Robb]: is, there's a massive red flag being
waved. And you should understand that if you're
561
::[Robb]: the one on the phone, you're just as
bad. And I don't even care if it's. not doing
562
::[Robb]: anything bad or malicious, like talking
with people you're not supposed to, if you're
563
::[Robb]: just on your phone, that's a bad thing.
It's like, I learned, I forgot what I was watching,
564
::[Robb]: but they talked about not having a TV
in your bedroom if you're
565
::[Tina m Garcia]: Yeah,
566
::[Robb]: mates.
567
::[Tina m Garcia]: we didn't have one in our bedroom.
568
::[Robb]: You should never have one. The TV should
be for the living room, and when you go to
569
::[Robb]: bed, it should be about being together.
And I think it's a great idea. And I understand
570
::[Robb]: why people have them. I don't think
there's anything wrong with it if you are consistent.
571
::[Robb]: So you turn it on in the morning to
watch the news and that's it. If you're gonna
572
::[Robb]: watch a show, you watch in the living
room and you go in your room and you go to
573
::[Robb]: sleep. And the
574
::[Tina m Garcia]: Or
575
::[Robb]: same
576
::[Tina m Garcia]: you have
577
::[Robb]: goes
578
::[Tina m Garcia]: sex.
579
::[Robb]: for, yeah. Or,
580
::[Tina m Garcia]: Yeah.
581
::[Robb]: I mean, let's just
582
::[Tina m Garcia]: Get
583
::[Robb]: say
584
::[Tina m Garcia]: close.
585
::[Robb]: it's, yeah. Let's just say it's a sleeping
thing. You're both tired. It should be about
586
::[Robb]: being intimate with each other without
having anything else around to get you out
587
::[Robb]: of that. And that's why you shouldn't
have a TV in your room. So I don't have a TV
588
::[Robb]: in my room now. And I live alone. I
just thought. Don't get used to that babysitter
589
::[Robb]: for myself. So, and I do my best now
when I go to sleep, and I go to sleep early,
590
::[Robb]: because I get up super early in the
morning. I walk in, I do whatever I need to
591
::[Robb]: do, brush my teeth, check my phone the
last thing. I turn, if you haven't ever done
592
::[Robb]: it, I put on Brown Noise, which is amazing.
I go to YouTube, there's a YouTube channel
593
::[Robb]: for Brown Noise. I turn that bitch up
and. Out I go. I
594
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm.
595
::[Robb]: try not to lay in bed and be on my phone
because it doesn't help you. So it's no different
596
::[Robb]: if you're doing it alone or if you're
with friends or with family. We need to find
597
::[Robb]: a way to stop this before it ruins society
outright. And I wish I had an answer for how
598
::[Robb]: to do it because it's an electric leash,
right? We all have them now. Whether you're
599
::[Robb]: 11 or you're... 70.
600
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
601
::[Robb]: Everyone has one of these things in
their hands. So I don't know. I just think
602
::[Robb]: that from a family standpoint, please
stop using them as babysitters. I understand
603
::[Robb]: why you do it, because it definitely,
if you have a kid who's crying or crazy, it's
604
::[Robb]: much easier to throw an iPad in front
of them to calm them down. But I think you're
605
::[Robb]: just hurting yourself because they're
always, it's a pacifier. They're always gonna
606
::[Robb]: want the pacifier. From
607
::[Tina m Garcia]: And then
608
::[Robb]: a cup.
609
::[Tina m Garcia]: they don't really want you.
610
::[Robb]: Yeah, because
611
::[Tina m Garcia]: You know what I mean?
612
::[Robb]: you're not
613
::[Tina m Garcia]: They're
614
::[Robb]: as fun.
615
::[Tina m Garcia]: like, I don't need this. Just
give me my game and I'm good.
616
::[Robb]: Yeah, leave me
617
::[Tina m Garcia]: Yeah.
618
::[Robb]: alone. And then heaven forbid you gotta
take it away from him. Oh,
619
::[Tina m Garcia]: Right?
620
::[Robb]: oh dude, I've seen some crazy, crazy
monster fits.
621
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
622
::[Robb]: And just like, oh, so, you know, thankfully,
I mean, my kid, we didn't have iPads. He ended
623
::[Robb]: up getting my phone for some things,
but I would take it away. And he was pretty
624
::[Robb]: good. He has his own phone and he's
had it for a long time. And he'll be on it
625
::[Robb]: when we're in the living room together,
but if we're watching something, I try to tell
626
::[Robb]: him, look, if you don't wanna be out
here, I thought he'll wanna watch something
627
::[Robb]: with me. Are you watching or are you
on your phone? I'll call him out. And I think
628
::[Tina m Garcia]: Even
629
::[Robb]: that,
630
::[Tina m Garcia]: now?
631
::[Robb]: oh yeah,
632
::[Tina m Garcia]: Hmm.
633
::[Robb]: mostly if it was something he wanted
to watch, like we'll watch
634
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mmm.
635
::[Robb]: anime together. He'll come out and go,
hey, you wanna watch the show it's on today?
636
::[Robb]: Yeah, cool. And I'll hear him in the
corner. I'm like, dude, I thought you wanted
637
::[Robb]: to watch this. Like, make up your mind.
Because if you don't, we'll go back and do
638
::[Robb]: it another time.
639
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
640
::[Robb]: So, if I'm watching something and he's
in the corner, I won't say anything, that's
641
::[Robb]: on him. But if it was something that
we wanted to do together, like, this is the
642
::[Robb]: part that when people do things together,
that's the whole point. And again, that's where
643
::[Robb]: it kinda leads back to like, dating
or. or being in a couple and being on your
644
::[Robb]: phone in front of each other. To me,
that's just a tell sign that you're not right
645
::[Robb]: for each other. You should be able to
646
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
647
::[Robb]: communicate and put your phone down.
The only time you should bring your phone up
648
::[Robb]: is to like, hey, did you see this? And
you can show somebody or this is what happened
649
::[Robb]: today and then put it right back down
and continue that conversation.
650
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
651
::[Robb]: A phone can be a set piece where you're
bringing it in to say, hey, this is what I
652
::[Robb]: saw, this is what the picture was. and
then put it back down and continue. I mean,
653
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm
654
::[Robb]: like I said, when I went to dinner not
too long ago, my friend was showing me pictures
655
::[Robb]: of grandchildren, showed me boop, boop,
boop, boop, boop, put it down. And the rest
656
::[Robb]: of the conversation we had was conversation.
So it's important. And mostly going forward,
657
::[Robb]: because since we're in the dating market,
those are things that I look at now. that to
658
::[Robb]: me are just big flags. I don't wanna
sit at a table and watch you on your phone.
659
::[Robb]: I could be at home. It's just easier
for me.
660
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
661
::[Robb]: Or if this isn't going right, it's okay
to say, I gotta go. If you're not interested,
662
::[Tina m Garcia]: I agree.
663
::[Robb]: awesome. There's net up or shut up.
You gotta either get out or not. Don't hang
664
::[Robb]: out here because you think you have
to. And... And then on the flip side, if you're
665
::[Robb]: in a relationship or a marriage, for
fuck's sake, don't be on your phone all the
666
::[Robb]: time. Whether
667
::[Tina m Garcia]: Right?
668
::[Robb]: it's at home or in a restaurant or when
you're out with your friends, it's the kiss
669
::[Robb]: of death. It's nothing but problems
and will drive a huge stake in between your
670
::[Robb]: partner and yourself.
671
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm. I don't even watch
TV anymore. I don't know I Didn't I I used
672
::[Tina m Garcia]: to like to watch TV in my bedroom
like growing up We all had TVs like all four
673
::[Tina m Garcia]: of us had TVs in different
rooms and we would all sit in there and be
674
::[Tina m Garcia]: alone and do Whatever we did,
but we always interacted our house was super
675
::[Tina m Garcia]: busy. And then when I got with
my ex He was like no TVs in the room. I'm like
676
::[Tina m Garcia]: what how do you even how do
you survive that and and We didn't have one
677
::[Tina m Garcia]: for, well, I think we got one
the last couple years of our marriage in the
678
::[Tina m Garcia]: room. And then it just never
got turned on unless it was during the day
679
::[Tina m Garcia]: when he was gone and I was
folding clothes. I might turn on something
680
::[Robb]: Mm-hmm.
681
::[Tina m Garcia]: to watch. And that was it.
And so then when I moved in with my dad, because
682
::[Tina m Garcia]: we were getting divorced, it
was during COVID. And everything on the news
683
::[Tina m Garcia]: was gloom and doom. So I completely
quit watching TV.
684
::[Robb]: Mm-hmm.
685
::[Tina m Garcia]: I will at night if I'm by myself
or if my cousin comes over and we're looking
686
::[Tina m Garcia]: at a show together, we're watching
it together, I'll turn it on then. But for
687
::[Tina m Garcia]: the most part, now when I have
a TV in my bedroom, because I live with my
688
::[Tina m Garcia]: dad, and I turn it on and I
don't even get to the part where I pick what
689
::[Tina m Garcia]: I'm going to watch and I fall
asleep. I just don't have any desire to.
690
::[Robb]: Mm-hmm.
691
::[Tina m Garcia]: to even look at anything, I
think, because we're so, there's so much during
692
::[Tina m Garcia]: the day, I have to answer text
messages, um, and phone calls for work. And,
693
::[Tina m Garcia]: and, you know, then there's
everybody I know, and then there's family obligations
694
::[Tina m Garcia]: and, and my phone is on all
the time. So by the time the end of the day
695
::[Tina m Garcia]: comes, I'm like, I just want
to read, I'm going to put this down. I'm going
696
::[Tina m Garcia]: to, I'll turn on the music
on it and then I'll read, I'll read my book
697
::[Tina m Garcia]: until, you know, I'm done.
And then I go to sleep. It's. It's crazy how
698
::[Tina m Garcia]: I've, I've changed that. Cause
I, I would say I used to be so involved. Like
699
::[Tina m Garcia]: I remember what the day MTV
came, came on. Like I was watching TV. We were
700
::[Tina m Garcia]: watching that.
701
::[Robb]: Mm-hmm.
702
::[Tina m Garcia]: We had snacks. We were all
together. The friends were all together. We
703
::[Tina m Garcia]: watched that together. And
it was cool because we, we communicated the
704
::[Tina m Garcia]: whole time. Oh, did you see
that? Oh, that's a good, you know, we had so
705
::[Tina m Garcia]: much to say, but now when we
watch TV together, so there's none of that
706
::[Tina m Garcia]: going on. There's no interaction.
Everybody's just quiet and they'll be on their
707
::[Tina m Garcia]: phone, do whatever. And it's
just quiet time where you're allowed to have
708
::[Tina m Garcia]: free time. And I, I don't like
that.
709
::[Robb]: Right.
710
::[Tina m Garcia]: I liked it better when we were
interacting and I'm glad that I put everything
711
::[Tina m Garcia]: down. Like the social media
gets put down the, the, the outside activities.
712
::[Tina m Garcia]: And I always tell people, if
you want more attention than you're getting
713
::[Tina m Garcia]: from me on the phone. Let's
go to lunch. Let's
714
::[Robb]: Right.
715
::[Tina m Garcia]: go
716
::[Robb]: Let's
717
::[Tina m Garcia]: hang
718
::[Robb]: hang
719
::[Tina m Garcia]: out.
720
::[Robb]: out.
721
::[Tina m Garcia]: But don't get pissed off at
me because I don't wanna be on my phone all
722
::[Tina m Garcia]: day.
723
::[Robb]: Right.
724
::[Tina m Garcia]: And I'm on it a lot, so.
725
::[Robb]: It's just so much interaction. There's
726
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm
727
::[Robb]: so much interaction. So, and again,
whether you're again at work, like for me,
728
::[Robb]: I can be on my phone, but my phone rings
all day at work, so
729
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
730
::[Robb]: I'm always answering the phone. So it's
kind of in between. And there's just so much
731
::[Robb]: things. Like I watch TV, and I obviously,
like I watch sports, I watch hockey. So I can
732
::[Robb]: sit for three hours and watch hockey,
but. Most of the time I'll watch whatever the
733
::[Robb]: show is I'm watching and then just kinda
sit in the background.
734
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
735
::[Robb]: There is something about shutting off.
I think when it comes to sleep, social media
736
::[Robb]: has fucked up people's sleeping pattern
737
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
738
::[Robb]: because you're looking at this screen
and if you're not changing the blue light setting
739
::[Robb]: to where it gets kinda brown at a certain
hour, that blue light is. horrible for us and
740
::[Robb]: as humans to take in all this blue light
and go to sleep.
741
::[Tina m Garcia]: Well, it wakes you up. It causes
your body to
742
::[Robb]: Yeah, to actually
743
::[Tina m Garcia]: wake up.
744
::[Robb]: wake
745
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
746
::[Robb]: up. So when we're doing this, we're
fucking that part up. So you're not sleeping
747
::[Robb]: well. You're not talking with people
anymore. You're not communicating with the
748
::[Robb]: family that's in the same house. You're
not talking to your mate that's on the same
749
::[Robb]: couch. What are we doing? We're slowly
or now vastly, changing,
750
::[Tina m Garcia]: alienating ourselves from.
751
::[Robb]: yeah, changing how we do things as human
beings.
752
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
753
::[Robb]: So I don't know. I think that there's
a way to curve it. If you're getting into a
754
::[Robb]: relationship, I think there has to be
a boundary and it should be talked about. It's
755
::[Robb]: no different than talking about your
political beliefs or religious beliefs or whatever
756
::[Robb]: these things are that you. end up talking
about, phone should be part of that. It should
757
::[Robb]: be like, look, I understand that we
have phones, but when we're together, we need
758
::[Robb]: to find a way to be together. Don't
disappear into a phone, because if you disappear
759
::[Robb]: into a phone, and with social media
the way it is, you're looking, it's too easy
760
::[Robb]: to escape to someone else on social
media. So you get wound up in that. From the
761
::[Robb]: family standpoint, It's just rules of
the house. I think you,
762
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm
763
::[Robb]: as a parent, need to go, this is how
much time you get on that iPad. You don't,
764
::[Robb]: you know, you turn in your phone at
the end of the day. No one wants to do that
765
::[Robb]: shit because you think it's causing
problems or rifts between you and your children.
766
::[Robb]: That's just the way it is. I have a
friend of mine who has three kids in the house
767
::[Robb]: and she has them locked down. They turn
in their iPad. Every day. And it's timed. When
768
::[Robb]: they get on, you have an hour, she takes
that shit away after an hour. Because she wants
769
::[Robb]: them to interact as kids. Like go be
a kid.
770
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
771
::[Robb]: I mean, they play outside. So like to
me, that's good. It's okay to do that. You're
772
::[Robb]: not alienating your kid from being part
of society. Part, you know, because I've heard
773
::[Robb]: that part too. Oh, I. You know, I need
my phone so I can talk to my friends. Nope.
774
::[Robb]: That's not how it works.
775
::[Tina m Garcia]: Yeah,
776
::[Robb]: You
777
::[Tina m Garcia]: tell
778
::[Robb]: know.
779
::[Tina m Garcia]: your friends to come over.
780
::[Robb]: Yeah.
781
::[Tina m Garcia]: Tell your friends to come over.
Like, let's go get in the pool together. Let's
782
::[Tina m Garcia]: go, you know, see a movie together.
783
::[Robb]: Let's do
784
::[Tina m Garcia]: Spend
785
::[Robb]: something.
786
::[Tina m Garcia]: time.
787
::[Robb]: And I think it can be done. We're in
a weird spot for sure because phones aren't
788
::[Robb]: going away. They're just, they're gonna
be in more hands and more hands and more hands.
789
::[Robb]: Unfortunately, I think it's going to
really, really hurt society. There's
790
::[Tina m Garcia]: I think
791
::[Robb]: a really,
792
::[Tina m Garcia]: it already has.
793
::[Robb]: there's a really good... documentary
on Netflix about social media. If you haven't
794
::[Robb]: seen it, it's amazing. I'm gonna try
to get the, it's called The Social Dilemma.
795
::[Robb]: If you
796
::[Tina m Garcia]: Hmm.
797
::[Robb]: have not seen it, you must.
798
::[Tina m Garcia]: I probably won't, but...
799
::[Robb]: You should, I think it'll be good for
the show. It'll be good for commentary, because
800
::[Robb]: I think once you see it, you're gonna
go, holy shit. They're working us. Like, they
801
::[Robb]: have programmers on it that talk about
how they, it does certain things to keep you
802
::[Robb]: on longer. It, the algorithms are meant
for you to stay on as long as you can.
803
::[Tina m Garcia]: You're kidding.
804
::[Robb]: No, my friend down the street told me
to watch it and I was, pardon the word, flabbergasted.
805
::[Robb]: Like, it was like a punch in the dick.
You're just like, oh shit, we're getting worked.
806
::[Robb]: It's meant to keep us on, it's meant
to make us angry. It's meant to do certain
807
::[Robb]: things. And these are from people who
worked for Facebook, Instagram, Twitter. These
808
::[Robb]: are people who were programmers. It's
a great, great documentary on how evil social
809
::[Robb]: media is. And your kids should watch
it. Your grandkids should watch it. Your nieces
810
::[Robb]: and nephews should all watch. To see
that they're just getting played. And we all,
811
::[Robb]: I mean, and so are adults. Don't get
me wrong. We're all being played. It's a very
812
::[Robb]: scary, scary thing. Check it out on
Netflix. It's called The Social Dilemma. Because
813
::[Tina m Garcia]: Hmm.
814
::[Robb]: I think you'll see that they want us
to have a phone in our hand. Because that's
815
::[Robb]: how most of us get the news now, which
is a whole other scary part. We don't
816
::[Tina m Garcia]: and
817
::[Robb]: even
818
::[Tina m Garcia]: there's
819
::[Robb]: have to
820
::[Tina m Garcia]: so
821
::[Robb]: watch.
822
::[Tina m Garcia]: much advertisement on it, which
823
::[Robb]: Oh yeah, oh
824
::[Tina m Garcia]: in the
825
::[Robb]: yeah.
826
::[Tina m Garcia]: beginning there wasn't as much.
827
::[Robb]: No,
828
::[Tina m Garcia]: And now it's like, I don't
829
::[Robb]: that's all.
830
::[Tina m Garcia]: wanna see this shit. I keep
blocking it. I block all of it. Like,
831
::[Robb]: Yeah, that's all
832
::[Tina m Garcia]: why
833
::[Robb]: it's about
834
::[Tina m Garcia]: did you wanna
835
::[Robb]: now.
836
::[Tina m Garcia]: block it? I don't want it.
837
::[Robb]: Yeah, that's all it's about now. It's
all
838
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
839
::[Robb]: about making money.
840
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
841
::[Robb]: And the longer they keep you on, the
more apt you are to buy something or see something.
842
::[Robb]: So, and,
843
::[Tina m Garcia]: You know what I,
844
::[Robb]: mm-hmm,
845
::[Tina m Garcia]: I'm sorry, go ahead.
846
::[Robb]: now keep going.
847
::[Tina m Garcia]: You know what I'm having a
problem with is people put on live videos and
848
::[Tina m Garcia]: they'll tag me in them. And
I feel like I don't wanna be a voyeur. I don't
849
::[Tina m Garcia]: wanna like, you know what I
mean? I don't know how to act. Am I supposed
850
::[Tina m Garcia]: to say something? Am I just
supposed to watch? Like. I don't want everybody
851
::[Tina m Garcia]: seeing our conversation if
852
::[Robb]: Mm-hmm.
853
::[Tina m Garcia]: I say something to you like,
oh, you know, you're driving home from work.
854
::[Tina m Garcia]: You know, if I say that, like
then somebody knows that I've talked to the
855
::[Tina m Garcia]: person that I'm talking to,
I may know more than they do. And the jealousy
856
::[Tina m Garcia]: factor with women is crazy.
I find that I have a hard time with that. I'm
857
::[Tina m Garcia]: like, I look and then I get
off and then I'll just text them like, I don't
858
::[Tina m Garcia]: know how to act. So
859
::[Robb]: Right?
860
::[Tina m Garcia]: I got off the live. shit. But
I don't like it. That's probably why
861
::[Robb]: Yeah,
862
::[Tina m Garcia]: I don't
863
::[Robb]: it...
864
::[Tina m Garcia]: know how to deal with it is
because it's not, it's foreign to me. I don't
865
::[Tina m Garcia]: know how to
866
::[Robb]: Yeah,
867
::[Tina m Garcia]: act.
868
::[Robb]: well because it's really not normal.
869
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
870
::[Robb]: I mean, from the standpoint of how we
look at life.
871
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
872
::[Robb]: That's why
873
::[Tina m Garcia]: And
874
::[Robb]: I was
875
::[Tina m Garcia]: what
876
::[Robb]: kind
877
::[Tina m Garcia]: are
878
::[Robb]: of.
879
::[Tina m Garcia]: you saying in that live video
to me? Like if there's music on, what is that
880
::[Robb]: Right.
881
::[Tina m Garcia]: song? Is it supposed to mean
anything? Are you just sharing a song? Like
882
::[Tina m Garcia]: set me up so I know what I'm
supposed to be thinking.
883
::[Robb]: Right. Well, like I said, I think that
it's, we live in such a weird world now that
884
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
885
::[Robb]: social media has just fucked us all
up. It's like I've said it a bazillion times,
886
::[Robb]: it's the greatest worst thing ever and
the worst greatest thing ever.
887
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
888
::[Robb]: It's brought people into our lives that
we wouldn't have got back together with them.
889
::[Tina m Garcia]: and maybe
890
::[Robb]: So,
891
::[Tina m Garcia]: should not have.
892
::[Robb]: I mean, yes
893
::[Tina m Garcia]: You know, there's
894
::[Robb]: and no.
895
::[Tina m Garcia]: a reason that we don't see
people, you know, after
896
::[Robb]: Yeah,
897
::[Tina m Garcia]: we quit talking to them.
898
::[Robb]: I mean, I think a lot of things has
to do with distance,
899
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
900
::[Robb]: you know? But it's, so there's good
and bad in everything. It's like, look, they
901
::[Robb]: bring back people, or people fade away.
You'll post something and then people that
902
::[Robb]: you thought your friends will just disappear.
903
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
904
::[Robb]: So, like I said, it's a good and bad
thing, but I think going forward in the world,
905
::[Robb]: we have to understand that the phones
need to be slowed down from a personal standpoint,
906
::[Robb]: we have to find a way to put them down
as much as we can to keep social relationships
907
::[Robb]: together, to keep marriages together,
and to keep families together.
908
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
909
::[Robb]: Try to find a way to, I mean, pardon
the easy one to say is, just put the phone
910
::[Robb]: down. We have to do this as a society.
because there is a social dilemma. And the
911
::[Robb]: social dilemma is we're becoming so
padlocked to something that's in our pocket
912
::[Robb]: that we don't know how to not take it
out when we're bored. So I don't know, my thing
913
::[Robb]: is just that put it away, find a way
not to do it, whether you're drawing, reading,
914
::[Robb]: outside, walking, you know, find a way
to not be on those type of things. And when
915
::[Robb]: you're with people, be with them.
916
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
917
::[Robb]: It's pretty simple. I enjoy that. I
enjoy putting a phone down and having a conversation
918
::[Robb]: with another human. There's nothing
better than that. I mean, you can FaceTime
919
::[Robb]: all you want, but there's nothing better
than looking in the person's eyes when you're
920
::[Robb]: talking to them.
921
::[Tina m Garcia]: That's very true. But the FaceTime,
like my friends in El Paso, when they call
922
::[Tina m Garcia]: me and they're on FaceTime,
I feel like I'm there. So
923
::[Robb]: Sure.
924
::[Tina m Garcia]: in that situation, I love it.
But if it's somebody that's right down the
925
::[Tina m Garcia]: street, just come over, I don't
care if you're in your pajamas, come
926
::[Robb]: Mm-hmm.
927
::[Tina m Garcia]: over, come hang
928
::[Robb]: Yeah.
929
::[Tina m Garcia]: with me.
930
::[Robb]: For people that are far, far away, yes,
931
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
932
::[Robb]: FaceTime is amazing. It is. It's the
one way that you don't have to get on an airplane
933
::[Robb]: to see somebody.
934
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
935
::[Robb]: But if they are close, and to me, close
is two hours. Like if you can drive to see
936
::[Robb]: someone and have a dinner or have a
breakfast and sit across the table and communicate
937
::[Robb]: with them, do it every single time.
Because
938
::[Tina m Garcia]: I agree.
939
::[Robb]: those times are... They're priceless.
So.
940
::[Tina m Garcia]: and you don't get them back,
that's for sure.
941
::[Robb]: Nope. And you don't get time in your
own house back either. So if
942
::[Tina m Garcia]: Mm-hmm.
943
::[Robb]: you're in a relationship and these people
are on their phone in bed or they're on their
944
::[Robb]: phone here or they're doing this, stop.
It's gonna be the death of your relationship.
945
::[Robb]: And the trust issue in society now is
already shitty. You wanna make it worse, be
946
::[Robb]: on your phone all the time.
947
::[Tina m Garcia]: I agree.
948
::[Robb]: can't, can't. All right, well, we have
done our due diligence on why
949
::[Tina m Garcia]: Hehehe
950
::[Robb]: you shouldn't have a fucking phone out
when you're around people.
951
::[Tina m Garcia]: You almost went a whole episode
without saying that word,
952
::[Robb]: I know,
953
::[Tina m Garcia]: and here you go.
954
::[Robb]: I know,
955
::[Tina m Garcia]: It'll probably come out three
more times before we're done. Ha ha ha.
956
::[Robb]: I, nah, no, I'm gonna do my best and
not say the F word before we get off, so.
957
::[Tina m Garcia]: nice.
958
::[Robb]: But yeah, it's a opinion show, so don't
get it twisted. Make sure you come back every
959
::[Robb]: Wednesday, check out those cool social
medias that we talked about earlier, listen
960
::[Robb]: to us on all the platforms, share this
show. Send it
961
::[Tina m Garcia]: Please.
962
::[Robb]: to everyone you know and say, at
963
::[Tina m Garcia]: Yes.
964
::[Robb]: least listen to this and see if you
like it. And if you do follow us, we're on
965
::[Robb]: every Wednesday. Anything else you got
to say there, Tina?
966
::[Tina m Garcia]: We're almost at our 100th episode.
967
::[Robb]: I know we're inching towards that. I
think it's sometime
968
::[Tina m Garcia]: Yeah.
969
::[Robb]: in June, sometime in June. We'll have
to come up with a cool thing to talk about
970
::[Tina m Garcia]: Who
971
::[Robb]: on our.
972
::[Tina m Garcia]: knew we'd be doing this over
a year and 100
973
::[Robb]: I know.
974
::[Tina m Garcia]: episodes like it's it's insane
975
::[Robb]: Yeah, I think we're on like 91, I think
is
976
::[Tina m Garcia]: Yeah.
977
::[Robb]: where we're
978
::[Tina m Garcia]: When
979
::[Robb]: at right
980
::[Tina m Garcia]: people
981
::[Robb]: now.
982
::[Tina m Garcia]: say, how's your podcast? I'm
like, we're almost to a hundred episodes. They're
983
::[Tina m Garcia]: like, you haven't been doing
that that long. I'm like,
984
::[Robb]: Yeah,
985
::[Tina m Garcia]: but we have,
986
::[Robb]: well
987
::[Tina m Garcia]: we
988
::[Robb]: we
989
::[Tina m Garcia]: have.
990
::[Robb]: have. I know it's crazy.
991
::[Tina m Garcia]: Yeah. I listened to a couple
of episodes too, by the way,
992
::[Robb]: Sounds
993
::[Tina m Garcia]: as
994
::[Robb]: good.
995
::[Tina m Garcia]: I was driving and, uh, and
I think we've gotten way better. I hadn't listened
996
::[Tina m Garcia]: in so long
997
::[Robb]: Hehehe
998
::[Tina m Garcia]: since like the beginning. And
I was like, ah, we're, we're, we're in the
999
::[Tina m Garcia]: groove now.
1000
::[Robb]: where we
1001
::[Tina m Garcia]: We
1002
::[Robb]: are
1003
::[Tina m Garcia]: got
1004
::[Robb]: in
1005
::[Tina m Garcia]: this.
1006
::[Robb]: the groove.
1007
::[Tina m Garcia]: Yeah.
1008
::[Robb]: Yes. So our, this episode is 93. 93.
So, all right. Well, until next week, I'm Rob
1009
::[Robb]: O for my cohost Tina. As always, we'll
see you in a week. Bye Tina.
1010
::[Tina m Garcia]: Bye!
