EP # 200 200 Episodes of Growth and Reflection

Robb (: 00:00

And welcome to another show. Don't get this twisted. I am Rob along with my co-host as always, Tina. How you doing, Tina? yeah. I look at first first physical therapy today. And thankfully, she didn't like stretch me out horribly. But she did tell me she's going to. So but it was really good.

Tina (: 00:06

I'm hanging in there Rob, I sound like I'm doing a little bit better than you are though coming out of that surgery.

Yeah

Tina (: 00:24

Nice.

Robb (: 00:29

I got some exercises to do for the next week and but I'm well on my way. She was kind of impressed that my that I could move my arm, you know, a little bit here and there and that I wasn't in tremendous pain. Yeah, when I told her I didn't take any percocet, she was like, bravo. I was like, yeah, yeah, it's pretty wild. So, yes.

Tina (: 00:42

Nice.

Tina (: 00:48

That's awesome.

Yeah. So today, today is our 200th episode. Who would have thought?

Robb (: 00:58

no one Not not even us Look, I mean when we made it to 11 because that's the average what a podcaster does these days I was I was like, okay, we got we're getting on a roll You know, we did pretty good then we hit 50 and I was like, shit like like we're like we got this shit down pretty good And if you go back and listen to some of those not that they're bad shows

Tina (: 01:00

Not even us.

Tina (: 01:09

Right?

Tina (: 01:13

Yeah.

Tina (: 01:17

What the hell?

Robb (: 01:28

They're just not very well produced. That's the better way of putting it for me. Just because I didn't... I really just didn't know how to edit yet and how we didn't have really great mics yet. So there was a couple of things that were just not as good. You know what I mean?

Tina (: 01:32

I so.

Robb (: 01:56

And like, and I didn't expect it to be right away. Like, I had things to learn, right? So, so as we went, and I think that a lot of the early conversations were good, like, they're not bad shows. I probably would have not did the one we did first, just because now looking back on it, it's very one dimensional of being like, you kind of have to live in the San Fernando Valley to really get it.

Tina (: 02:02

We all do.

Tina (: 02:23

Who listens to that shit anyway though? I mean come on. We got 200 episodes

Robb (: 02:23

It's that that is very true, but it just to be fair. It's our most listened to show. Yeah, it was number one, and I think. Yeah, he couldn't even go to him. Some of them are gone. If you listen to that show.

Tina (: 02:33

Yeah, it makes sense. But and and we were doing that when we were on COVID lockdown. So not even the restaurants. They weren't even really. Yeah, you couldn't even go to them. We I think we were just nostalgic for normal.

Yeah.

Robb (: 02:51

My favorite taco place is not there anymore. Yep. Gone. Yeah. Well, obviously, Chi-Chi's. They did. Yeah. Did we talk about Rosy's? I don't know if we, I don't remember. Yeah, they're on Parthenia now, right?

Tina (: 02:53

right, and Casa de Pizza changed owners. And who else did we say?

Yeah, they're still there. They, but they took a huge hit. So did the, not the Papoosa place, but the, what are those damn things called? Rosies is there, but they're not good anymore. And they moved.

No, they're on Corbin. Yeah. lots of different things going on in the Valley. You know what? All the good restaurants that I used to like to go to, they fall. They're gone. I mean, there's very few that we go to right around where I live now. Sad.

Robb (: 03:22

Corbin. Corbin. There's some pretty good ones where I live.

Tina (: 03:46

I know you have got the best stinking food out there. I've been with another friend that lives out in your area. I've gone with him several times and you know whenever we were doing what we were doing to eat and every time I go out there it's delicious. So I should be going out there more often actually.

Robb (: 03:50

There's some pretty good food. Yeah, there's some pretty good spots out this direction.

Tina (: 04:08

Yeah. We went to one place and it was, it was some sort of an Asian food, but I had never had it before. It was, it wasn't Chinese. It wasn't Japanese. wasn't, there wasn't sushi or anything, but it was an Asian restaurant. And I can't think of what.

Nationality it was but we went in and we're trying to look at the menu We had no freaking idea what anything was so I closed my eyes and just pointed like three different times So we got three different things and I got to tell you it was the best food I ever had So it was Korean food actually, but it was Korean food. It wasn't this like poppy sort of Korean fusion stuff that they're doing it was

Robb (: 04:47

There you go. Nice. Yeah, I think that there's...

Tina (: 04:55

So delicious. was impressed. I think I marked it to go back there. But yeah, it was amazing.

Robb (: 05:06

There's so many different things out this direction, although there is in the valley too. I mean, to be fair. But I think the valley's just changed a lot, you know, since we were younger. but yeah, it's interesting. was, I actually went to Chi Chi's not too long ago with my old neighbor.

Tina (: 05:10

Mm-hmm.

Tina (: 05:16

A lot. A lot.

Robb (: 05:27

And we talked shop a little bit, just life, know, catching up with people. And he, he, he even kind of was like, yeah, cause he still lives over there on San Fernando mission to Havenhurst. Yeah. Where I used to live and, yeah. But, his life is changing. He got offered a job. The cut. He works for a store in the mall and they want him to be a manager.

Tina (: 05:32

Mm-hmm.

Tina (: 05:41

Tina (05:46.201)

That's funny.

Robb (: 05:57

If you can believe this, I've told him if he doesn't take the job, I'll take it in Pismo. I was like, you're going to take the job, correct? He was like, yeah, I think so. I said, look, it could be expensive to live there, though. I'm sure you know what I mean, because it's a beach community. But I said, dude, whatever you do, ask for a shit ton of money and then get a small apartment. You'll never be home anyway.

Tina (: 06:03

Tina (06:17.699)

Yeah.

Tina (: 06:27

Yep. Yeah, you'll be in Pismo. Come on now.

Robb (: 06:27

Like, yeah, you'll be in Pismo the whole time. And he's like, yeah. And I said, dude, that's a good opportunity. It's, it is, look, Pismo is beautiful, but it is kind of in the middle of nowhere. You know what I mean? No, I'm just saying though, like to be around other human beings, it's like, you can drive a long time and then there's Pismo and then you can drive a long time and there's fucking nothing. know, central California is kind of a weird.

Tina (: 06:43

It's at the beach, who cares?

Tina (: 06:54

Yeah.

Robb (: 06:57

or mid central California is kind of a weird. I told him to take that shit in a second. Yeah.

Tina (: 06:58

I would totally go to Pismo. It's close enough, but far enough. Yeah.

Robb (: 07:04

I mean, look, take your take your shot, bro. go, I would do it in a second, but mostly him both like his mom just passed away not too long ago. His father passed away years ago. said, look, it's time. What's holding you back now? I can pick up the ball and run with it. And. Yeah, it's. And and I think that that's, you know, since we're going over

Tina (: 07:15

Yeah.

Tina (: 07:25

Exactly. If I didn't have the ties, I would do it. I would do it in a heartbeat.

Robb (: 07:34

kind of like what things we've done since episode one. know, and things have changed in our lives. Yes, lots of things actually, right? And I think that it's an interesting thing because I've met some a few people here and there trying to date or whatever.

Tina (: 07:42

Things have changed. I'm not even the same person I was when we started this podcast. Holy crap, have I been through it.

Robb (: 08:04

over the last year. And it's funny because when I tell them, oh, you know, I have a podcast and they're like, really? I was like, yes. And I go, you know, it's really cool. But before, let's go on a few dates before you listen to it. And she's like.

Tina (: 08:14

you

Tina (: 08:25

Nah! I just don't tell people or anybody I've dated. It's...

Robb (: 08:30

Yeah, I mean, I don't care, I warned them. I'm just like, look, I'm going to be honest. Like, I say whatever I want on it and I don't care and I will probably offend you. And they were like,

I want to be honest, I'd like to be upfront. So yeah, it's... I... Yeah, I didn't even know about it for two years. Right?

Tina (: 08:52

Yeah, I pissed people off and didn't even realize I was being offensive That's that's been great and and I I pissed off my ex's ex. That was a good time I'm like, I got a little dig or I didn't even know That's hilarious actually Nor do I care to be honest with you

Robb (: 09:14

I mean, yeah, I mean, to be fair, I'll tell you that it's kind of the, it's the dangerous part of doing this, right? You know, with any, anything that you, like the internet, let's just say the internet now, if you're a YouTuber or a podcaster or a creator, whatever you want to call any of those three things,

things because that's, you're gonna piss somebody off. You're just are. And I, I heard the guy who wrote the book, the subtle art of not giving a fuck. If you haven't read it, it's absolutely brilliant book. But he said something I have, I think I have it here. I'll bring it out. It's good. And it's little. It's not even that long. It's really, but he goes over a lot of cool things. The thing that, that he, he does.

Tina (: 09:42

You're gonna offend somebody.

Tina (: 09:54

Mm-hmm.

Tina (: 09:58

I need to read that.

Tina (: 10:05

Okay.

Robb (: 10:11

He has Instagram and he'll post stuff. He said something, the best thing I ever heard, goes, everyone has to be comfortable with not being liked. He goes, your life will be so much better when you realize you don't care if people like you or not.

Tina (: 10:21

Yeah.

Tina (: 10:27

Mm-hmm.

Robb (: 10:27

Because once you do that life opens and I was like, huh? And I was mostly thinking of the show, right? Like because we. Say whatever we want shit, you almost forget that you say shit.

Tina (: 10:45

I do forget because I'm talking to my friend. I tell you what I tell you and then I don't worry about it It's like I'm not lying to you. I may not have said it to make everybody happy but I Yeah, and yet there's so much that I don't say

Robb (: 10:48

You know what I mean? That's probably true. Look, I don't want I won't tell you that I'm like a that 100 % of the things I say come out of my mouth.

That's not true. But I will tell you that it's probably 95%. Because there's some things... No, no, not that I don't mean it. I'm saying there might be things I don't say. Oh no, if it comes out of my mouth, I mean it. There is absolutely no filter there. If I've said it on here, I fucking mean it.

Tina (: 11:24

Oh come on, everything you say, you mean it? I mean...

Tina (: 11:43

Mm-hmm.

Robb (: 11:44

but I will tell you that I might not have said something, but it's rare,

Tina (: 11:50

I I I really well, I'm okay. So let's go back the start of this. I was just entering The beginning stages of a divorce. I don't even think I had moved out yet when I started doing this so there was a lot of things I couldn't say for a long time just because

Robb (: 11:54

For sure and I told you to I said don't say things

Tina (: 12:12

Yeah, you said don't get me in trouble and thank God I didn't get in trouble I didn't I I've never had a problem with my ex of him saying he heard anything or I mean I think I I do believe that I I portray him in the best light possible because he is a good person and I don't feel bad About him in general. I mean we've we've gone through a couple of situations where I was like I don't know if we're gonna be friends after this

Robb (: 12:28

Sure.

Tina (: 12:41

And it's gonna take, know, whether we do or not, it's gonna take him working on it. I'm a friend to everybody, so he's gonna have to make an effort in order for that to be whatever it's gonna be. But I don't foresee there really being a problem. There's just not.

Robb (: 13:00

Right. mean. It's funny, because someone listened to this podcast, they listened to the last episode. Maybe the last episode, I forgot which one. I don't remember, but it was basically talking about

no, Old Flames coming into our lives. That's the one that they listen to. Yeah, and for me, this girl goes to me, she goes, it's really nice that you're like, you know, friends with your exes. And I said,

Tina (: 13:19

Mmm. Yeah, I kept my mouth shut a lot on that one.

Robb (: 13:32

I do my best not to hold a grudge. And I do. Now, you know, are there people that I might not talk to? Sure. But I think that that's just protecting my my own feelings. You know what I mean? Where it's not, it's not that I don't have love for them anymore, because I do. I have deep feelings for them and I care about them.

Tina (: 13:36

Mm-hmm.

Tina (: 13:51

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Robb (: 14:00

But I just think it's better that I don't talk to them. For my brain. But I would. If I bumped into them at the store, I wouldn't ignore them.

Tina (: 14:03

Yeah.

Yeah.

Robb (: 14:12

Because that's not who I am and and that's and look she's My personal feelings for her and my friendship for her are different, but the same Right. So like I care about her and if she called me right now Like literally if she called me right now, I would help her now I might keep a distance You know, I would still keep my distance for my heart not to break but I

Tina (: 14:12

Right?

Tina (: 14:32

Come.

Robb (: 14:42

I would definitely, I would help her because I care about her and she is my friend. So, relationships with exes or not, or I shouldn't say having relationships, but not being mean to them. It's like, you know, the girl who sued me. I've talked to her, you know, and I, know, my best friend was like, why are you talking to her? Like nothing good can come from it. And I was like, nothing bad can come from it. I'm just not.

Tina (: 14:42

Yeah.

Tina (: 14:47

Absolutely.

Tina (: 15:01

Mm-hmm.

Tina (: 15:10

Right, if you don't put yourself in that position, you won't have a problem. Yeah.

Robb (: 15:13

Yeah, I won't have a problem. So it was nice for someone to kind of just go, oh, it's really nice that you're like that. And I was like, yeah, why? We are, humans are humans and we're gonna do certain things. And look, I understand when people have bad cutoffs and never talk to other people again, totally understand it.

Tina (: 15:31

Thank

Robb (: 15:34

I totally understand it. Because some people hurt you so deeply that you can't come back from it. So that I understand. Yeah, yeah, and it snaps into a lot of pieces. So you just can't pick those back up. But it's interesting, mean, doing this show,

Tina (: 15:34

Agreed.

Tina (: 15:48

Yep. Sometimes, sometimes the rubber band breaks.

Mm-hmm. Yep.

Robb (: 16:04

for me is great because I get to vent and it's therapeutic for me I can kind of let things out if I need to get them out whether whether you know whoever listens to this show thank you it's great and they're from all over I mean every there's a lot of countries a lot of countries then

Tina (: 16:23

Mm-hmm.

There is a lot of countries and a lot of states like a lot of people have listened to it in different states here. We I think we only have like one state that we need to have a listener from or two maybe.

Robb (: 16:34

Yeah, one or two like Delaware and something else. Someone in Rhode Island the other day listened. So yeah, there's just a lot. like I will say to anyone who has listened to the show, thank you very much. It's great. I hope we entertain. But so like I can look up where people have listened.

Tina (: 16:43

Mmm.

Tina (: 16:57

Mm-hmm.

Robb (: 17:04

Right what countries they are or I can bring it down in ours to states and where they're at But like the United States obviously we've had most of our stuff in the states We've had Singapore Germany France India the United Kingdom China Australia Canada Ireland Brazil Spain the Netherlands Iceland Mexico Peru Russia Japan Sweden Italy Norway Poland

Tina (: 17:07

Mm-hmm.

Robb (: 17:34

and Turkey. Austria, Colombia, the Philippines, South Africa, Angola, Belgium, Guam, Hong Kong.

Israel, Kenya, Saudi Arabia, Cambodia, Chile, Costa Rica, the Dominican Republic, Finland, Georgia, not in the States, that's Russia, Latvia, Morocco, Nepal, Nepal, man, that would be some snow and some yetis there, New Zealand, Nigeria, New Guinea, Romania, I think we're at the end of our list here, Taiwan,

Turkey, United Arab, and Vietnam. So there you have it. All of those. So at least one download in all of those countries. And when I say one, there's a lot of them that have one. But ones that I was shocked about was like, yeah. No, like Singapore. Singapore, we've had 283 in Singapore.

Tina (: 18:20

Are you serious?

Tina (: 18:24

Wow.

Tina (: 18:38

New Guinea?

Tina (: 18:42

Georgia?

Tina (: 18:46

Wow.

Robb (: 18:47

Yeah, Germany at 206. So like, you know, there's, there's people in other countries that are listening to the show, which is simply amazing. Yeah, it's pretty neat to think that some people who obviously come from a non English speaking country, but obviously understand English. Listen.

Tina (: 18:51

That's crazy.

Tina (: 18:57

That's awesome.

Tina (: 19:13

Or they don't and they downloaded it and they don't know what the hell we said.

Robb (: 19:17

Yeah, mean, exactly. But I think that they, I mean, you can look it up. If you look at our, like if you went to Apple or Spotify, it says what language it's in. So, but it's just an interesting thing to think that like, you know, something that came out of my noggin one day, just talking about wanting to share opinions with people. It's interesting and I've had a great time doing this and

th of: 2001

Tina (: 19:51

Yeah, 200 episodes and that's in like three years, right?

Tina (: 19:59

No, it can't be throu- Can it? It's more than three years.

Tina (: 20:11

Wow, so it's been almost four years.

Robb (: 20:14

Almost four years, four years in just a couple of months. And we've done pretty well about coming out every week. I know there was a couple of, you know.

Tina (: 20:19

Wow.

Tina (: 20:27

We had a couple months where life just wasn't easy on us.

Robb (: 20:30

Yeah, and and and I don't think we've ever skipped more than one ever I know we've skipped one and then made it up and and and me and Tina have some ideas because since I am Laid up or for a little while For a for a what are they what would the young and say for a hot minute?

Tina (: 20:35

Right.

Tina (: 20:50

for a bit.

Tina (: 20:56

Yeah, well, I don't know. We used to say that, so don't think it's really a youngins thing.

Robb (: 20:57

yeah, maybe not. Maybe they just, I think they took it from Gen X. We are going to try to get ahead on shows like we used to. And we're gonna have some podcast parties where we sit down and record a couple of shows and eat and drink and be merry. So those are going to be coming. We're getting our friends lined up to sit down

Tina (: 21:05

Maybe.

Robb (: 21:27

and talk shop with us. Hopefully, hopefully we can offend some more people. Because if if we bring one person on, I think he he has kind of a loud mouth like me. Our friend with the with the broken leg. He could I think he might be a little. He might be a bit much. What about what about you said you have some.

Tina (: 21:48

Tina (22:05.443)

I got both. I I could, I was thinking of calling up like a girls, having a girls episode where you could just kind of facilitate it or whatever. We would just talk on different things. Yeah. No, you can still be on it. Just,

Robb (: 22:14

I think that would be really fun. No, no, I know, but I'll produce it. I'll basically, I'll...

Tina (: 22:24

Let us roll with it.

Robb (: 22:25

Yeah, but I'll throw my 17 cents in.

Tina (: 22:29

I'd like to get like two or three of my girlfriends together and get them drinking and then have them on the show. I think that would be fun.

Robb (: 22:36

That would be fun. Yeah, and maybe come up with a decent, something good to talk about. Like women, no, but I mean, yes, I wanna kind of do a guy show as well where like we talk about, I wanna do one on like, where we've talked about men's issues before, me and you.

Tina (: 22:45

we got tons of stuff to talk about.

Robb (: 23:01

together and talk about like what's really going on like why are we so for one we're giving up on relationships men are giving up they don't and I don't know and I don't know why I mean I do but I don't

Tina (: 23:10

Absolutely.

Well because women are such freaking bitches to them I couldn't imagine like I really am having a problem with that because women are so just ugly to men you know they feel like men are

Men have no place on this earth because they could do it all and they're sadly mistaken that's that says that's an idiotic approach to living because Women need men more than they know probably now more than ever and men are just like why in the fuck am I trying I? Mean I see that all the time with my friends even I was like you need to stop what you're doing to him and start treating him Well, because when you don't have him

Robb (: 23:37

Yeah.

Tina (: 23:59

He's never gonna want you back and you're gonna end up feeling like a fool because you're just being a jackass. So I feel for men these days and being single and trying to date them when they're already broken, it's a waste of time because they're never gonna believe that they're gonna find somebody that actually wants to work with them.

Robb (: 24:23

Right. Yeah, and look, I think we are different. We've talked about it.

Tina (: 24:27

or be close to them or be anything to them, you know?

Tina (: 24:36

by far.

Robb (: 24:37

Pazillion times on this show and thank goodness. It's one that will never go away Tina will be always be able to talk about the differences between the sexes We're and again, I'm using the bell curve here on the show We're just simple. I think men are just very simple creatures and and women Like excitement so when you mix those together unless you can find a guy who's like into that I

Tina (: 24:44

Men and women, yeah.

Robb (: 25:06

Some girl told me the other day, she was like, I, you know, I just want to be with somebody who's, who's like fun and likes to do things. And she goes to this guy I dated.

He just wanted to sit at home, watch TV and he really didn't want to go out very much. And I was like, OK. And she's like, yeah, we dated for like two or three months. And I was like, how? So one of you guys had to to bend because if not, you sat in the house and watch TV with him or he went out with you.

Tina (: 25:39

Mm-hmm.

Robb (: 25:40

because or you've you met in the middle, but I just found it interesting where because I think men are simple. We can. There's older dudes have been watching some of these videos there. They're reverting back to like their youth. They would rather sit at home and play video games and watch TV than go out with women. That's crazy to me and look, do I want to go out? You know every weekend. Fuck no. That I.

Tina (: 25:58

Mm-hmm.

Tina (: 26:07

Yeah, but if you find somebody they don't want to normally go out any every weekend anyway They want to just I read in the beginning of relationships. All you want to do is be with the other person So it it doesn't seem right or doesn't seem like it would be It would even happen that you would go out every weekend

Robb (: 26:10

Mm-hmm. Yeah, but I think some women, older women are... You know, look, this is what I think happened to a lot of people. They had children so early that they gave up that life.

And now that they're, you know, 45 and older, their kids are 20 something years old, they can go out and do whatever they want. So now they're reverting back to that 20 year old girl where maybe the man that they're didn't get married until they were like 30. Their kids like now only 22 and they're like, I've lived my twenties. I don't, I don't want to do all that shit. I want to fucking chill out. And again,

Tina (: 26:48

Mm-hmm.

Tina (: 27:08

Yeah.

Robb (: 27:10

that these are things that I think that would be a good women's program for you is to talk like, we should do, that's what we should do. You should do a female show on that same thing and then I'll do the male version of it and we'll see what both sexes say.

Tina (: 27:14

Mm-hmm.

Tina (: 27:19

Hmm.

Tina (: 27:28

None of my friends are really dating though. Nobody is actively looking for anything they've settled for what they've always been with or they just don't they do what guys do. They just don't want to

Robb (: 27:31

Or they're not. Right, but why? That's what I'm saying. I think that that would be a very interesting cultural thing. If it was me and two dudes and then you can facilitate it, right? We'll have you kind of ask

Tina (: 27:46

We could talk about that.

Tina (: 27:52

Mm-hmm.

Tina (: 27:58

yeah.

Robb (: 28:01

questions from the female view and then all kind of ask questions from the male view. I just think that there's so many different things that this show has done and we have and that's why sometimes it becomes difficult to find things to talk about because we've really talked about a lot of stuff. Like where...

Tina (: 28:05

Mm-hmm.

Tina (: 28:24

Yeah, for sure.

Robb (: 28:27

Where even when we revisit, I think it's fun. Like I think that doing the love language ones was fun because it was like three years apart. Like it was so far apart. And to find out that have we really changed much? not really. No. But, but we have.

Tina (: 28:36

Mm-hmm.

Tina (: 28:44

I don't think we have. No, not in that respect. But I, I found that since I've been divorced, doing it a second time, like three years later, how much more I require. And not that, not that it's much, but it's like, I found that somebody needs to be more engaged with me. Like that I can't just

Robb (: 28:49

Correct. Right.

Tina (: 29:10

They can't just throw me some flowers and think that I'm going to be cool with that. Like where it used to work, you know, now it's like, no, I need you to spend time. I need you to hold my hand. I need you to say something nice. Like now it's more, it's more than ever. And, it's still, it should be effortless. It's not, I'm not asking for, for money. I'm not asking for cars. It's, it's more emotional.

Robb (: 29:21

Yep. Sure. I think that a lot of people, you know, I think I've been kind of talked about in a matter that like,

I'm a year like you're so much or yours and that not that I need something I want to give a lot But to me time is everything Quality time is the greatest thing in the world I can I could go and hang out with somebody and Help them fix their house and get just as much as going out drinking at a bar

Tina (: 30:09

Again, it's it's spending time. It's not it's not I don't I Don't understand why people don't Understand that time is a necessary thing in order to create a solid relationship It's not about money that gets spent. It's not about places that you visit. It's about the solid

Robb (: 30:18

Yeah.

Tina (: 30:32

foundation that you create with one another and that's normally in like the the Like the most simplest of places You know, it's it's sitting on the couch watching a movie and talking or it's it's about taking a drive and and holding hands it's it's about sharing ideas and You know even even text messaging in dating is so if if somebody can't

entertain me even just a little bit in a text. I understand them that they are not my type of people. They're not my type of people because they're not putting any sort of effort into it. Not that a text is an effort, but I like to say something funny or, my gosh, I woke up late today and had to speed to work and hit every light or just tell them something.

Robb (: 31:07

You

Tina (: 31:29

about what is going on in my world. And if I don't get that back, I'm bored. Because I need that interaction. And I need somebody's brain is what I need.

Robb (: 31:44

It's funny that you say that.

So me and the kid were at lunch yesterday and he was talking about his girlfriend with me. And he kind of went down that road with reciprocation. So my son isn't a big texter. Matter of he hates it. But his girl called and said, Hey,

Tina (: 31:50

Mm-hmm.

Tina (: 32:08

Yeah.

Robb (: 32:16

or text him and say, hey, can I call you instead of just calling? And he goes, I've told her a million times, just call me, just call me, just call me. And I said, okay, listen, I was trying to like hold his hand a little bit to get to the finish line because he's like, I just can't take this. I said, listen, you have to understand the person you're with. And he goes, well, I do. I go, then you can't complain. He goes, but I don't wanna keep telling her, just call me, just call me, just call me.

Tina (: 32:41

Mm-hmm.

Tina (: 32:46

she doesn't feel comfortable calling you or she would.

Robb (: 32:46

gonna be and and I said because she because she he she goes to him you're always busy and I go buddy you're always playing that game and they go your job as a boyfriend is if she calls you pick it up I don't give a shit what you're it's one game who gives a shit let you die if you die you die it is what it is or whatever it is and he was like yeah and I said but and I said so if you tell her call

Tina (: 33:03

Mm-hmm.

Robb (: 33:16

you can't complain about it on the backside. But the flip side is I go, have to make her comfortable enough to do it. And he goes, well, we've been doing this three years. Awesome. Said, just so you know, when you have little children, you are gonna have to do the same shit. You can tell a little child a bazillion times it's okay to do this. And they're still gonna say, can I, can I, can I, can I? I go, something, we're all, we all have back,

Tina (: 33:19

Mm-hmm.

Robb (: 33:46

baggage. We all have something. And this is kind of going down that road, what you kind of said, though, like he goes, if I text her like really happy in the morning and I get back a Oh, hey, I'm all right. And that's it. He goes, I go into shutdown mode. goes, Okay, whatever. Talk to you later. And I was like, and I understand that. Thankfully, I'm

I like people who are very, very open. If I text you, hey, good morning, how you doing? I would rather hear, I'm having a really shitty day today. I don't mean to cut you off, but I need a little alone time.

Tina (: 34:19

Mm-hmm.

Robb (: 34:37

I flipped the alone switch. But here's the flip side of that. And not in a mean way, won't, you have to text me back to say alone time is over. Yeah, because, and I told him that like you have to learn to read people. I go, cause he's, he is pretty simple. My son is a pretty simple creature.

Tina (: 34:47

I'm better now or how you doing?

Robb (: 35:02

Until he's not and then I want to punch him in the noggin But but he is pretty simple and and I said you have to reinforce the idea that you're simple to her Make it about you not about her Whether it's about her or not, it's irrelevant just go hey, this is how I am please do it this way and and and and see if that works and they go maybe she just was waiting for you to like literally

Tina (: 35:05

you

Tina (: 35:24

Yeah.

Robb (: 35:31

open both gates. He's like, yeah, but I've already had a gate open. Yeah, well, the reality of that. Yeah.

Tina (: 35:37

She's a woman. And sometimes going through life, women just get a little insecure and they need a little more. And guys need to know that and not take them as crazy. Just say, okay, I get it. Even if she doesn't wanna talk, just say, well, I was thinking about you, I love you. And...

Robb (: 35:40

Yeah. Exactly. Yeah, I do my best to say that now because I've had some

Tina (: 36:00

When you're ready to talk about it, I'm here. I mean, it doesn't have to be such a horrible situation all the time.

Robb (: 36:10

friends that aren't the greatest communicators until they need to drop bad news on you, then they're really good at it. But generally they're like, you know, you, have to kind of swerve around and go over here and hop over the fence and go, Hey, you know, what's going on? It's and like, I get it. Like some people don't want to hurt your feelings. They're just not good at it instead of, you know,

Tina (: 36:14

Mm-hmm.

Robb (: 36:41

Sometimes it's better just to, you know, untie the knot and let the boat go out to sea. Yes, for sure. Agree.

Tina (: 36:48

Well, and you gotta remember too, not everybody is gonna be good every day. They're just not. They're not. And I mean, I always, I always tell people, like I'm always open. You know, you could always call me whether I'm in a good mood or a bad mood, but I'll tell you, this is something I cannot and will not talk.

Robb (: 37:09

Yeah, and see that I would rather hear things that way. I, the way my brain works is better that way to go. okay, cool. That's what I needed to hear.

Tina (: 37:11

about with you today because I'm just not there. But let's we could go anywhere else talk about anything else. I'm here. But not that. And you have to give me time to process too.

Tina (: 37:25

Yeah.

Tina (: 37:32

Yeah, once I figured out, know, so, so in the beginning of this podcast, and we decided to get divorced in the beginning of, COVID and I was really going through it, but I couldn't figure out what to say to people. couldn't get the narrative. Like everybody's going to say, why, what happened? Cause they thought we had a really good relationship and we did.

Robb (: 37:51

you

Tina (: 37:59

But it wasn't fulfilling us anymore. and I, at the time I couldn't tell you that I couldn't tell you what happened or what was shit. A lot of times I still can't cause you know, it's just a situation where it wasn't one thing. It was a lot of things. So I took about nine months before I let anybody know we were getting divorced because I had to figure out the narrative and nobody could help me. You know, everybody's going to take a side when you get divorced and

Robb (: 38:09

yeah.

Tina (: 38:29

Well, he did this and he did that and I'm like, yeah, but I did this and I did that and my friends would be like Well, no you did that because of this and I would tell them regardless This is actions that we both took

Robb (: 38:43

Mm-hmm.

Tina (: 38:46

Now we're dealing with it. So we're gonna have to figure it out and I don't need you to take my side like There's no side to take because I'm just as fucked up in the relationship as he was When we weren't doing what we needed to with the other person so For me it was like take the time

Robb (: 38:54

Correct. Correct.

Tina (: 39:10

to figure out what you really need to say and then say it. So I remember being very quiet and like reserved and thankfully because of COVID, nobody really knew what was going on because we were all struggling and isolated and staying in one place. So as much as that was a huge like hole in my heart, the whole COVID thing.

Robb (: 39:25

Yeah.

Tina (: 39:39

It defended me and my wants to just be really quiet. So I was grateful for that. But yeah, now I look at things and I go, when I figure out how I could tell you, I'll let you know, because I'm having, I'm struggling, but I didn't know to say that before. And I think people need to understand that.

Robb (: 39:46

I think what you just said is like pretty basic on how

We, you know, like we were trying to talk about how we've changed in almost four years. How I, how I look at things and how, how I process things I think is different now. Since then to now, cause I've gone through some, you know,

Tina (: 40:18

Yeah.

Tina (: 40:32

Yeah.

Robb (: 40:39

friend things. I'll say relationship, even though I wasn't in a relationship, just whatever it was. Yeah, where I tried to process things differently. Because there's you have to and I think this show has really kind of showed me the other side of the fence sometimes it's it's nice to have, you know,

Tina (: 40:45

situationship.

Robb (: 41:06

you who is going to give the female side of it, even though you're not like every female where and where I'm not like every male, you know, I'm I'm definitely more on that. Hopeless, romantic. I just I think that sometimes it's it's it's definitely an anchor like it can.

Tina (: 41:13

No. Right.

Tina (: 41:23

Yeah, you're way more open with your feelings more than any guy I think I've ever known.

Robb (: 41:36

It can hurt me more.

Tina (: 41:36

I used to think that you were like that with me because we didn't have any romantic feelings. It wasn't until we've grown up that I realized that you're just more like that in general. You know, I always assumed that because I couldn't hurt you because we weren't going to date, that you could just be more open with me. Maybe that's partially true. But also I felt like, I felt like

Robb (: 41:58

Probably.

Tina (: 42:08

I was because we were such good friends and I was just privileged to stuff that most women weren't and I think that that was partially true too, but Now that you've gotten older now, you're you're more you're so much more open than you've ever been in your life like you I'm impressed that you were able cuz damn trying to six weeks to get you to talk to me was not easy and now you'll talk about everything

Robb (: 42:18

Right. Yeah. I think after my divorce, I really kind of opened up everything. Just kind of, you know, because like like you, you come out of it where

Tina (: 42:41

Yeah.

Robb (: 42:47

There's everyone picks a side. There's no win. There's never a winner or loser everyone loses Coming out of divorce. I don't care how you slice or dice it you lose something you lose people You lose money you lose Part of who you are, know, whatever it is So but I definitely think I became more open talking wise just because it was easier

Tina (: 43:07

Okay.

Tina (: 43:14

Yeah.

Robb (: 43:14

And then so many people have so many fucking questions after it. You're like this and that and this and that. Right. So, and you know, like I said, I was in, I was in a situationship for a while. So yeah, it was, you know, and sometimes I had to vent to somebody. Even though even that wasn't a hundred percent. I will say that I've definitely, like I said, I 95 % people know 95 % of what's going on in my life generally.

Tina (: 43:18

my god, the questions. Just shut up and let me say what I'm gonna say and shut up.

Robb (: 43:43

There's always gonna be something that you hold on to because you don't want to Yeah, well and for a lot of different reasons I know I wouldn't want to hurt anybody else. I wouldn't you know, I like I said, I I've done enough Yeah, and I don't and and look I I say dumb shit like all the time it's gotten me in trouble where

Tina (: 43:46

Nobody needs to know that 5%.

Tina (: 43:55

Mm-hmm You don't want to leave anybody in a bad light. Yeah

Robb (: 44:08

You know, I'll say something and I thought like, they should take it this way. And they're like, no, I didn't take it that way. You're like, okay. Yeah, but that's, these are all learning things. We're gonna learn until we're, they put us in a box or put us in the fryer. We're just going to, you learn all the time. I have, I've definitely learned, mostly I would say in the last 10 years, I've learned a lot in the last 10 years. Just, there's just been a lot going on in.

Tina (: 44:15

Who knew?

Tina (: 44:24

I would hope so.

Robb (: 44:37

And some of it good, you know, I picked up my whole life and moved, you know, not far away, but to get a better job and get ahead. And that's worked for me. And. I came up with some crazy idea to do a podcast and my idea in the beginning was to do it alone. And then I tried and then I realized that I can't is talking to yourself is great when you do it in your own room. But when you're trying to do it in front of a microphone, it doesn't work.

Tina (: 45:07

Yep.

Robb (: 45:07

And then I thought, hey, who else could talk? And well, that wasn't very hard. Because I knew you would. Even though, I will tell you, if we're being 100 % honest, like in the beginning, it was...

Tina (: 45:14

That's true.

Robb (: 45:26

It was kind of hard to get things out of you to a degree. Yes. And again, not even just about your relationship. I think it was about everything. Like it could have been about like, do you like the flavor of, you know, Cocoa Krispies? And you would have been like, well, you know, the chocolate taste. You were just, I think. No, just.

Tina (: 45:30

because I was afraid that everything and anything I said was going to be judged. I still worry about that. I do.

Tina (: 45:53

Over... I was overthinking life.

Robb (: 45:56

That's what I think. think because you really didn't listen to podcasts a lot, where I listen to them all the time, where I think that I was already knowing what I wanted, or what format or how I thought about it. So going in, I was already...

Tina (: 46:02

No, I still don't. I don't listen to podcasts still.

Mm-hmm.

Robb (: 46:22

I already had an idea and so it was easier and there was kind of a step off point though I think for you. know there was like you know I bet you if you listen to anything before episode 25 you might be a little more leery and then you know there was a jump off point where it was like oh I don't give a shit anymore and then

It definitely, we started rolling in a different direction. Yeah. Yeah.

Tina (: 46:51

I know, I still think I need to be more open still. Like I said, until I have a narrative of things, I don't say too much. And I've noticed that about myself and I've also noticed that that leaves, that that takes away opportunity from me. That I should just take when it first comes up, I should just go with it. And I'm learning, it's a...

You know, I've always been one to be very cautious about sticking my foot in the water. You know, you don't want to get a you don't want to have an alligator grabbing your whole leg, you know, and and you know, I have a good I believe it or not, I have a really good fan club of haters, the Tina Haters Club, and it seems like it's getting bigger. I'm like.

Robb (: 47:24

Mm-hmm.

Tina (: 47:38

all the time and you know they're finding those people on the outskirts of life that that don't like me and trying to bring them in and and and I I don't like to I don't like to put myself in a vulnerable place yeah

Robb (: 47:53

Mm-hmm.

Tina (: 47:58

And then, you know, people kind of shock me because they don't live by the same values and virtues that I do. And so when they don't, I'm like, you fuckers, you caught me, you know?

Yeah, so I don't know. I'm working on being more open. I'm very honest. What you get is an honest Tina every time. I will be honest with you. But I may omit certain things that I think should be private or should be or that I can't deal with yet. And that, you know, that's just the way it goes.

Robb (: 48:19

you

Yeah Yeah, I think that there's always going to be something a little close to the vest that's just and there should be for everybody But I also think that if it's an opinion and I'm in I'm

Tina (: 48:38

Yeah, that's me. Absolutely.

Robb (: 48:50

99 % coming out on this show. I I don't care if you don't like my opinion. That's the whole point of this There there should be a counter to this, you know it if this was 1965 this show would have been called like point counterpoint right Don't get it twisted. It's just something that we used to say back in the day where you know Don't get it twisted. These are

Tina (: 49:10

Mm-hmm.

Robb (: 49:20

This is just the way it is. So at the end of the day, know, this show for me is the therapy that I need and it's the outlet that I need and it's awesome for me. On the interwebs.

Tina (: 49:33

Hmm.

Tina (: 49:37

That's cool. I'm glad that you feel like that because for me it's I get to see your face every week You know everybody thinks we do this together. We were doing this on on on You know the internet yes, and and it's good because I could keep in contact with you because you and I We kind of ebb and flow like we'll go Years not really talking and then we'll be really close again, and then we'll go back, so this has kept it more more

Robb (: 49:57

Yes. Flowing. Yeah.

Tina (: 50:05

Yeah, more stable and more consistent. Maybe not stable, but consistent, because we've always been pretty stable. And we do get to share things. And I know that it has helped people. I know that it's helped me.

Robb (: 50:09

Did

Tina (: 50:23

Yeah, and it and it it keeps me from going completely silent, which I never thought that that would be something that I could do but I got to tell you I've been so knocked down that I have been pretty freaking silent and and won't talk and When I get to that point, it's just not it's not a healthy place. So this has really helped me with that and

Robb (: 50:32

That's true.

Tina (: 50:46

I did things that I thought I would never do like or that I didn't have the balls to do. But once I said it, I did it like getting my bike. That took probably a couple of years if you if you've listened to us steadily. But I did get the bike. I do have the bike. I I I love the bike. I mean, I've had a really great time on that. And and nobody believed me when I said I was going to do that because I took too long.

Robb (: 51:11

Yep.

Tina (: 51:13

But I did that and you know, I have everybody said, you're are you going to be able to live without him when I when I left my ex and here I am, you know, 45 years later, five years later, and I'm still alive and life is not horrible. It's.

It's a lot. I mean, I got a lot on my plate as I normally do. don't even being back in high school. I remember I was always the one that couldn't say no to anything. So I do way more than most people. But I find that I do enjoy living it. I do enjoy having that. And I didn't know that I could do that when we started this podcast.

Robb (: 51:45

you

Tina (: 51:56

Didn't think anybody would listen. I didn't think we'd get to 200 episodes. I didn't think that we We would enjoy it so much. I didn't think I Don't know. I didn't think a lot of things but I didn't know myself Five years ago as well as I do now and I don't think that that's

any reason other than I just was forced to. Life made me see who I really am and what I'm made out of. And I'm grateful that we've had the podcast because I can go back and I can look at things and say, wow, I'm different now, right? I believe so different than I did before. And I'm I'm excited for that. Not that I do it. I don't listen to episodes unless you tell me I need to or I need to reference something that's going on. But I do.

I do know that I can and God forbid if I were to die tomorrow my family could listen to all these things and see where I was at and what I was going through and maybe that'll make them feel a little bit better so I don't know it's kind of a legacy thing in a way so I'm digging it I'm digging it

Robb (: 53:05

Yeah, you know, I kind of agree. I think that this is definitely a time capsule, right? The flip side is I'm glad that like my mom got to listen before she passed away and always had something really funny to say about it. I remember like one of the first couple, she's like, she talks too much. I was like.

Tina (: 53:11

For sure, yeah.

Tina (: 53:18

Yeah.

Tina (: 53:23

you

Tina (: 53:30

And now if you notice I don't talk as much. It's funny.

Robb (: 53:33

Here's the funny thing is though, if you go back and listen to those shows, you didn't talk too much. She just wanted to hear me because like, and it was funny because like she said it one time and I go, mama, no. She goes, yeah. And I go, mom, I edit the show. Like I listen to it more than anyone. I do it, I edit it, and then I listen to it again. I know. And so she was like, okay.

Tina (: 53:36

She just wanted to hear you not me.

Tina (: 53:50

Yeah.

Robb (: 53:58

But I think you're right. think she just wanted to hear me talk because she just wanted to hear me. Mm Yeah, I mean.

Tina (: 54:01

She did. I wish I would have met her. I've known you since we were 16 years old and I didn't I I used to used to go to Iowa to see her I remember used to take those trips and I'd be like I want to meet her and we never got to do that So I kind of feel like I wish we would have had the opportunity

Robb (: 54:23

Look, I mean, she actually, I mean, she probably got to know you more than a lot of people just through this. You know what I mean? Yeah, I think that there's a lot to be said. I'm going to throw out something before we end this show, because I know we're like, or probably in an hour already. For those who don't know. And you're listening, you are one of.

Tina (: 54:30

Yes, I would agree. Yeah.

Robb (: 54:51

So I can look at how many unique listeners that means different people who have listened to this show. We've had 3841 different people listen to this show. And out of those people, they have downloaded this show 8000 times. So congratulations, Tina. We've had a pretty good run.

Tina (: 55:12

Wow.

Robb (: 55:19

And obviously we want people to continue to listen and to share this show as much as they can because they're definitely sharing the show because by the country I can see different places inside those countries that are... So people inside these countries are sharing the show with other people because they're close in proximity to some of the other ones. It's a very interesting thing.

Yeah, now for the next hundred. Three hundred will be our next. That's our I think in a real world thing, I would love to hit five hundred. That would be bitching. Yeah, well, yes, assuming we only put out one a week, I think that if we.

Tina (: 55:55

Is that our goal?

Tina (: 56:04

Ooh.

So we're looking at a 10 year run.

Robb (: 56:18

I think that there will probably be end up being extra shows because I want to kind of do some special things and We'll probably get there quicker We'll probably get to 300 quicker because I would like to do some weeks do two shows and do like a special thing But we'll we'll sit down and talk about that before bunko Because we let's you know, it'd be fun to do some, you know more things

Tina (: 56:46

Mm-hmm.

Robb (: 56:46

But yeah, let's say the next hundred. That's my first goal is a hundred at a time. That's would be the cool part. And just continue to keep having a good old time and saying our nonsense and getting our opinion out there. Anything else you got to say? Ditto, I think I've.

Tina (: 57:04

I'm all for it. Thank you guys for listening. Thank you, Rob. It's been a lot of fun. I've enjoyed it.

Robb (: 57:15

I've learned a lot. I learned a lot about you that I had no idea about. So that's that's always an interesting fact. And truly, I think the next hundred, I really, really, really wish that some of the people who have listened to this show leave a message on Facebook or Instagram or there's an email in the show notes, because now I'm actually checking that email. Go figure. We would have known that

Tina (: 57:18

Ha ha ha

Robb (: 57:43

someone's ex listened to the show two years ago. I forgot the password and I couldn't and then I got off on another tangent of whatever the hell I was doing. But I would really like more people to come on the show. Really all you need is a computer. We send you a link and you have some kind of headphone that has a microphone. You know, if you have an Apple, you can do it on your phone. You can download an app.

Tina (: 57:46

Hehehehehe

Tina (: 58:05

your phones. Yeah.

Robb (: 58:13

and do it on there. You can pretty much do it. There's many ways of doing it. So please, please, please, if you're interested, please get in touch with us because we'd love to have you on. And here's the best part. You can bring the topic with you. You bring the topic and we'll set it up. It might be a week out because I would want to do a little research if it was something that I didn't know anything about.

Tina (: 58:30

There you go.

Robb (: 58:43

which I don't know a lot about a lot of things. So, but yeah. Yes, that is very true. We have done more with less. So look, it's an opinion show. Don't get it twisted. Keep coming back every Wednesday. We appreciate that you're listening and to the next hundred cheers. And that's Tina. I'm Rob. We'll see in a week. Later.

Tina (: 58:47

Well, we've done we've done more with less.

Tina (: 59:09

See ya.