EP # 181 The Reality of Retirement: Are We Prepared? And some other crap included!

Robb (: 00:01

And welcome to another show of Don't Get This Twisted. I am Rob along with my co-host as always Tina. How you doing Tina? Yeah, super line of bullshit.

Tina (: 00:07

Hanging in there. I was gonna say I'm good, but that's just a line of bullshit. I'm doing alright, but life is life is on blast right now

just unblast. There's a lot going on. I feel like I'm dealing with a lot of, well guess it's our age, a lot of death in my circle and a lot of dementia is going on in my circle and there's a lot of construction that should be going on in my circle that's just not going fast enough. But other than that, I mean I'm okay. One of my best friends,

threw me a little party for my birthday and that was amazing. She's, she and her husband are just the best and all my friends showed up that she invited, you know, all the girls. And I can't complain there. That was a good, I'm, me personally, I'm doing okay. But life is kind of biting me in the ass right now. How are you doing?

Robb (: 01:09

Yeah, I can I get it

Same thing. by. know, trying not to sink when sometimes you feel like you're drowning. I'm just kind of getting by. But, you know, I mean, we talked about it last week with mortality, like, you got to live for sure. But it's hard when you see so much shit going on around you. It's very difficult.

Tina (: 01:37

Well that is life, huh?

Robb (: 01:40

Yeah. It's unfortunately, I mean, that's just the way it is. Speaking of like just crazy shit, we were talking about something that might work the other day because we all have 401ks at work and you're trying to put into it and do all these things. But then the reality of like, we ever going to really retire? First of all, think we were talking about

Tina (: 01:41

Unfortunately.

Robb (: 02:09

before we got on and like, like, are we, are we gonna be able to, you know, we're saving up all this money or like in your case, like you are independent contractor, you don't have that. So, you know, we're putting all this money in and I'm,

I'm putting money in and my company that I work for, they, they match like, I don't know, 6 % or something like that, 7%. So I'm, you know, I'm trying like, Hey, let's, let's do this or let's do that. And am I going to have, first of all, am I going to be healthy enough to enjoy it? That's one thing. Secondly, yeah, you know, we're, putting all this money away. You retire.

If you're lucky at what 65, that's probably not going to happen. So let's say 70. You're like, how many more years do you have left to spend the money that you saved up for? It's kind of this like catch 22. I, I was talking with some friends and they're like, yeah, you know, it'd be cool. But then again, why not just spend the money now while you're decently aged and enjoy it.

Tina (: 03:32

Well, you don't want to be an elder living on the streets. I mean...

Robb (: 03:36

That's what I'm saying. It's a balance, right? So, but what is it? Like, I was talking to a friend and she was like, wouldn't it be nice to know the when you're going to die? And I was like, oh, I don't know if I'd want to know the day. She's like, no, no, no, the year. And I was like, OK, the year would be at least better. She's like, yeah, because then you could.

Tina (: 03:38

Yeah.

Tina (: 03:49

No.

Robb (: 03:58

you could save up all this money and you know this is the year you're gonna die so you just go go crazy and do all the things that you want to do and and i kind of saw the point behind it like i'm saving up all this money let's say you have you know whatever i don't know how much i have in mind i mean i do but it's not i don't know but let's say you have you know 100 000 by the time you retire

let's say you have 150,000 now you're 65 or 70 and yeah you're be able to live on that for a little while but what's your quality of life by then so hopefully you're decently you know you have a decent life then you're good you can go travel a little bit you can do things and you can

pay your rent and do all that crazy shit. But I just don't understand. I don't think that it's going to be easy not to still have to work. That's just not enough money to sustain on. And even if you're getting, you know, you're going to get, you know, your social security, which is a decent amount, but not not, you know, the best.

Tina (: 04:58

Mm-hmm.

Tina (: 05:10

Yeah, I was when I was married my ex was told that at that that was five years ago He needed to have a million dollars in a million dollars saved up in order for him to live in In a good life like in a in a decent life like he's living now It would take a million dollars to do that. So a hundred thousand is not gonna do shit

Robb (: 05:12

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Not even close. So and then what you know? How many years are you going to live? I don't know. I trying to balance the two like retirement is sounds great and my dad did it at 55 and he was lucky and. He you know he and he also married to a younger girl and she worked until her retirement age and she also worked for the she worked for Caltrans and so did he and they have a decent retirement.

Tina (: 05:39

Mm-hmm

Robb (: 06:07

And they're doing great. But not I don't think many people for one thing, Social Security might not even be around when we retire. They have, but but I mean, I just don't know if it's if it's something that's really viable now. And and look, I get it, I don't want to be destitute and be on the streets at 70 for sure.

Tina (: 06:18

I've been saying that forever.

Robb (: 06:37

or 80. I'm just to the point where I'm like, man, it's, it's such a balance of how do we do it? Do I spend a little now and and be okay? I'm going to continue to contribute to my 401k, right? But I think I might peel it back a little bit with how much I put in. Because I was putting a pretty I was trying to, you know,

be on the front side of it and put a decent percentage in because I'm doing all right. I'm getting by, but. Man, it's rough. then this year on my taxes, I totally shit the bed somewhere. supposedly I did it the year before, and I don't remember. I was exempt paying the state. I didn't pay the state at all. And man, that was a wake up call. My tax lady, she's like, you didn't pay any taxes to the state. I was like, sure, I did. She's like, no, didn't.

And then I looked at my forms and I was like, shit, I didn't pay at all. So that was fun. I ended up having to pay the state like a thousand dollars. Yeah, that was sucky. I was like, shit. Which is funny thing is I just paid him today because I actually got my federal return, which was not a lot either. I'm to the point now where I'm just I'm happy to break even. Because.

Tina (: 07:37

Yikes.

Tina (: 08:03

Yeah.

Robb (: 08:05

I, you we're not going to, we're not getting a ton back anymore. you can only, you know, do so much. mean, you, you probably have a decent write off amount because of, you know, things for being a contractor, right? You're like, you know, scissors or, that kind of thing. Yeah. So you have, it's not a lot, right? It's not enough. Yeah.

Tina (: 08:24

any makeup, any hair stuff, that sort of thing. But it's not, it's not a lot. No, no. It seems like taxes are really sticking it to us these days, more than ever. And being single and being single, you pay.

Robb (: 08:36

Yeah. Even being married, I heard is is not what it used to be. Owning a house isn't even what it used to be.

Tina (: 08:50

No, No, no. Nothing is. And I'm hoping that that

Robb (: 08:53

Yeah, it's like. We can't.

Tina (: 08:56

You know, with Trump cutting everything the way he is because, you know, they're taking as much as almost 40 % from me of everything because, you know, being single and whatnot. And how can you live on making 60 % of what, you know, you make? It's ridiculous. So I'm hoping with this administration, if they're cutting everything because...

The bureaucrats are just getting so much out of us. Maybe we have a chance, you know? I'm hoping. I don't know. That's not a popular opinion. But please do something. Because I was, before this administration started, I was like praying every day. Like, how do we fix this? How do we get out from under the shit? How do we, you know, because, because

Robb (: 09:29

Yeah, for sure. No, it's not, but fuck, I mean, we need something.

Tina (: 09:51

Even education, we talk about education and the lottery and the money that's supposed to go to it. The money's not going.

to it needs to go. None of it is going where it needs to go as far as the lottery money. So it's like that's I know what I put into the lottery every year. I know everybody else does it too. That's that's so much money that needs to go. It needs to go to where it was allocated to go. And unfortunately, our government doesn't see that. It's like, well, I'm to give you this much money, but you're going to give me some back and I'm going to give you these benefits.

Robb (: 10:05

Yeah, I know.

Tina (: 10:29

No, that's not how it works. You don't get the money for being in charge. And that's what we're dealing with on a huge scale. And I'm not saying politically being one person over another is right. Nobody is. If you're a politician, you're one of the wrongest people I've ever seen in my life as far as I'm concerned.

Robb (: 10:33

Mm-hmm, for sure.

Yeah, generally that's right.

Tina (: 10:53

Yeah, but we, you know, we got to do something. So I'm glad that he's just going in there and saying, yeah, too much fucking money is going to this. Too much is going to that. Like, it's not going where it's supposed to. I'm grateful for that because things need to change, but I hope it doesn't kill us in the interim.

Robb (: 11:14

Yeah, I think getting to where we need to be might be the problem. You know, I know, look, things are going to start going up in price because of the tariffs.

Right now in theory if if we are getting the tariffs the they won't have to tax us as much right that's supposed to be the balance where Look that the point was is that you know he he wanted to us not have to pay federal income tax at all anymore Because the tariffs should balance that out and that's what it did. You know

Tina (: 11:36

From your mouth to God's ears, cuz...

Tina (: 11:44

Right.

Robb (: 11:49

I forgot what president it was. I want to say it was before the, it was in the late twenties. And that's, there was no federal income tax at all. We just tariffed everybody and that's paid for the roads and the government. And the other thing is we really need to stop all the crazy shit. Like you might not like Elon Musk in the Doge going into all these places and finding

Just crazy shit like millions of dollars are going for like, you know transgender studies in other countries It's like why? You know, we shouldn't be paying for all this stuff. This should be coming back to the people who live here And and again not having to pay such high taxes We'll see I think that's also another problem, you know, we're paying so much in taxes per year

Like if you didn't pay federal income tax, you know, a lot of people will make like an extra $10,000 a month or a year. $10,000 a year extra would change people's lives. Um, I know they're still thinking about, um, all this money that they found of cutting checks to us. Like, uh, uh, a little, Hey, this is what we found. We're going to.

Tina (: 13:02

Absolutely.

Robb (: 13:17

They said they could they think they could pay everyone $5,000 every single person in the United States five grand and still make money from all the things that they found so Me too Mm-hmm. So and and the thing that they've they've already passed it I think in the house or in Congress one of the two of no more tax on tips right

Tina (: 13:29

I believe it. I believe it because there's so much waste. So much waste.

Robb (: 13:46

no more tax on overtime and not taxing anyone's social security. hopefully I think it's passed in the house and needs to pass in Congress or vice versa and then it'll go to the president's desk and he can sign it.

Tina (: 13:53

as it should be.

Tina (: 14:00

You know, they're also giving people that are getting Social Security more money. they just, a client of mine at work and my father just got notification that by the 20th or something of this month, they should be receiving a check. And I've heard anywhere from 5,000 to 20,000. I don't know where the difference was.

But they're getting money back. And I was like, finally, you know, there are people that are retired and living off Social Security. They should have enough. And my dad was laughing that because of him working as a postal worker, he was only getting like a hundred and something dollars a month for Social Security. And, you know, they just, they just sent that and he's like, hey, they raised my Social Security by almost $400.

All of a sudden they have all this money in social security to do that. So what was really going on? What was going on?

Robb (: 15:00

Mm hmm. Well, again, I think we were we were sending money outside the country to do dumb shit. And we shouldn't. And look, we can argue all day long. And there's also programs inside the United States we shouldn't be putting money into. So, you know, there's some

Tina (: 15:13

Mm-hmm.

Tina (: 15:22

Absolutely.

Robb (: 15:26

All these bills that they're passing are so packed. The front end of the bill is like what it's named after. Like we're going to do this. There's so many hidden things in those. You know, you can't have bills that are 700 pages long. A bill should be one page. And that's Exactly.

Tina (: 15:36

Yeah.

Tina (: 15:41

No. And it should be about one thing, not not all of this money for this and then it's going to go to that and it's going to go to this and no, no, no, no, no, no. Let's start with the bare bottom. Like, what are we doing with this? Like, break it all up. Let us choose what we what we put our money into, not put all of it into the bill and the friend that says, education is going to get this. And then. You know.

Robb (: 16:03

Correct. And then. Yeah, that's it. There's so and so much shit is hidden. Again, most of the people who vote on these don't read the bill. They have someone else who reads it and then tells them what it said.

Tina (: 16:12

Everything else goes on it.

Robb (: 16:24

It's like. No. It's it's crazy. The other thing is, I think what we need to really do is is.

Tina (: 16:24

None of us we don't even get the information to read 700 pages of a bill and we don't even understand it when we do and that's another problem you can't ask somebody who's not Writing these bills to be able to figure them out by a little paragraph. They send us along with our voting information No

Robb (: 16:50

You know, we give these people that we vote people in and they're the ones who are going to tell us, you know, or we tell them to vote on things based on, you know, a little snippet of why we vote on them. It's like so crazy. We're giving these people so much power and then they get into the position and they don't do anything for us. So, you know, at some point and look,

Tina (: 17:06

Mm-hmm.

Tina (: 17:12

Yep.

Robb (: 17:19

We can bitch about the government all we want. It's very easy to do. We all have our issues with it. We really need to start thinking bigger and holding these people accountable. And for one, like people, there has to be term limits. think we, on every position in the government, there has to be term limits. You should not be able to do anything longer than, you know, eight years, ever. We have people

Tina (: 17:34

by far.

Robb (: 17:48

you know, in Congress that have been there 50 years. Oh, that was a deep, that was a deep cut. That's a deep cut. The deep cut. I think there's people who are listening to this podcast are going to have to look that up. So Google, Google Slee stacks. Land of the Lost from the 70s. Just so you know, don't look it up from the movie. That was not as good. That's it. That's a deep cut.

Tina (: 17:52

And they look like sleet stacks from the land of the lost. They gotta be rolled in and sat down.

Tina (: 18:03

Yeah, look it up if you're not

Tina (: 18:14

still get the point of what I'm talking about though. It's true. Yeah.

Robb (: 18:16

Yeah, and it's funny because I've heard that from other people. They've used that on me too, sleaze stacks. I just think that look, know, at this point, they're spending so much money that I probably won't be able to retire. I'll probably work till I'm dead, which is, yeah, it's, and it's sucky. And even the people that I know that are in,

Tina (: 18:33

I know, that's what I'll be doing.

Robb (: 18:42

that have good positions that are, you nurses and have good 401ks and our union are even think they might not be able to. You know, it's like, I don't know, it's, it's, it's sad to me that that our generation is probably going to be the first to suffer through it all of the not being able to retire and probably anyone past us is definitely not going to be able to retire.

Tina (: 19:12

Well, I remember when my grandfather's sisters were, you know, when they were retirement age and they were like at the very end of their lives. I remember they didn't have what it took either. Like they had living with them. They had their their

their kids and then grandkids living there to just be able to get by to keep the house going to keep everything up. One aunt had to live with my grandparents for like seven years because she didn't have anywhere she could go. It's going to be like that where you're going to need family or friends or whatever. People are going to have to live together, be roommates in order to be able to sustain themselves.

Robb (: 19:42

Wow. Mm-hmm. Yeah. yeah, for sure.

Tina (: 20:00

You know, the problem with that is people don't put a lot of time into their family to begin with. You know, my grandparents taught us how to stick together and do for each other and, and, you know, make concessions to for everybody to be together. But how many people were taught that?

Robb (: 20:07

I mean, not many. think that, I mean, I guess it all matters what your culture is too. I think culture has a lot to do with that.

Tina (: 20:24

No, think it... I think it's just... I don't think it's culture anymore. I think it's just people in general. Like, there's very few people that put...

importance into things that they should. Religion is one. They took all that out of schools. They took it out of everything. And that is a basis for how you treat each other and family. That's where you get taught a lot of things about having faith and being accountable and tons of different things. just draw in a blank, but...

Robb (: 20:48

Yeah. Agree.

Robb (: 20:56

Mm-hmm.

Tina (: 20:59

than, you know, having family and taking care of your grandparents and your, your, you know, your, your cousin's kids and stuff. Like in my family, we were taught everybody takes care of each other. And if somebody is not able to do it, you step up and do it. I'm grateful for that. But how many families were taught that zero? Like, it seems like none of the people that I, that I was raised with even had family around like I did.

So where were their grandparents? Where were the babies that were being born into the family? They didn't grow up with them. They didn't have them around. So how are they going to be able to like stick together and take care of each other after retirement? I don't know that they're going to.

Robb (: 21:43

Right.

Tina (: 21:46

So it's going to be interesting to see what happens in my line of work. I don't have a 401k. I was married for 17 years. I thought that that was going to be part of what I would have to use. And now it's not there. I have a small chunk of change that, that I am saving and, and I, you know, it comes to me as I need it. but will that sustain me through retirement? No.

Robb (: 21:59

Mm-hmm. No.

Tina (: 22:13

So I do a lot of other things and try to put money away the best I can, but I don't know. I'll have a house that's paid off. That'll be it. Like I'll have a place to live.

Robb (: 22:21

Yeah. But even that it's even that is like scary as well. Because like, OK, let's say let's say you pay your your house off. And this is just, you know, playing the numbers. You know that that, you know, for one, it's it's a racket.

You own your house, but you have to pay property tax on it for the rest of it. So you're paying tax on something that you already own, which is the total bullshit. Like I can't believe and in this state, I've heard from several people who own houses. Are they to be able to pay the property tax, even if they paid it off? It's like, wow, or or someone who owns a. A trailer or whatever you want to call them these days, I.

Tina (: 23:11

a mobile home.

Robb (: 23:12

mobile home. They they not only do they pay rent on the space, they also pay a property tax. Which is, wait a second, which one is it? Rent. Yeah. So I don't know. And again, we live in a state that's that's probably not, you know, not conducive to

Tina (: 23:21

and rent on a space is almost as much as making a house payment is if not more sometimes.

Robb (: 23:41

you know, good rent or anything. So, but again, we also make more money in the state. So it's kind of, it's that balance. You can leave the state and you're still going to be not well off. Now, again, if you owned a house here and sold it, you could probably move out of state and own the house and still have money backed up. So I think that there is that. I just think that long run we're...

we're really chasing something that's probably not going to happen anymore. And again, probably you should, again, don't get crazy, but definitely live for the moment. Live now. You know, I'm not saying go out and spend all your money, but I think that you should definitely live. You know, look, if you want to go take a vacation somewhere, take it and worry about the back end because. Yeah, exactly.

Tina (: 24:31

Yep. Yep. A lot of people don't make it to retirement age. Yeah. I know my mom didn't. I think about that all the time. Do you, what do you save? What do you use? You know, how far do you take it?

Robb (: 24:37

Tina (24:49.826)

What will make me happy? think that's what I think that's what you go for you try to find something that'll make you reasonably happy and you do those things and then You know because happiness comes from inside if you don't have it inside doesn't matter where you go what you do You're not gonna be happy but on the flip side of that you still need to be responsible and take care of yourself in a way that you don't leave yourself without

Robb (: 24:58

Mm-hmm.

Robb (: 25:18

Yeah. Exactly. I'm to the thing where it's like, okay, look, I'm gonna save because well, I'm going to because I think that you have to have some nest egg at the end. But I definitely think a lot of us are going to start thinking about communes.

Tina (: 25:19

whatever that means.

Robb (: 25:38

Like, really living together on a big space. Yeah, I love the idea of like, buying a piece of land and putting a bunch of trailers on it. You know what I mean? Like at some point. I mean, it all matters how much it all matters how much land you had, you know, you could buy land in some states where you could put trailers two miles from each other. Like you never.

Tina (: 25:42

Yeah, that's what I was saying about family taking on other family. You live together and try to make it work.

Tina (: 25:55

Yeah, that wouldn't be horrible. Excuse me.

Robb (: 26:08

You know, you'd never see each other like that to the point of like bugging each other. I don't know. I just kind of came up at my work and we were just talking about like, shit, we're putting all this money into something. And is it really going to pay off? You know, and then shit, if you want to take it out, you know, they penalize you so much that if you. Yeah, so it's it's like.

Tina (: 26:31

It's ridiculous what they do if you need it.

Robb (: 26:34

You're almost better taking that money, although, like I said, where I'm at, they do match 7%. So it's cool if I put in seven, they match seven, so I'm really getting 14. But are you better off taking that money and putting it into a higher yield savings account where you're not going to get penalized for taking it?

Tina (: 26:58

There's not a real high yield on savings accounts.

Robb (: 26:59

No, I mean you can get like 3%. I think 3 % is probably the highest you're gonna get.

Tina (: 27:04

When I started, I was at 5%. I was getting 5 % back for what I had put in, which was great because nothing else was giving me 5%. But that's not even tax.

Robb (: 27:18

Yeah, no. Mm hmm. Yeah, that's what I mean. Like where where it's such a weird.

Tina (: 27:18

It's not even tax. It's like less than it's half of what we pay in in taxes day to day. So really, was it making me anything? I was still it was, but it wasn't because as fast as you get it, they're doubling down on you saying, no, pay that, you know.

Robb (: 27:42

a weird spot right now to what do we do and look everyone has you know you should talk to this person you should talk to this person and i agree i think there's there is something about saving you you should save money but again like are you going to enjoy it do i want to do i want to sit in you know a house and eat beans every day saying at least i'm gonna live but am i living i don't know i i think that we're

We're in a very weird time where look we're we're still young ish, right? Like we talked last week. We're definitely we're not at midlife We're way past our midlife if you're looking at numbers, right the numbers game So What do you put your money into? You put your money into a vacation every other year. Sure. I think that's a good That's a good point a good starting point. I should go in

Tina (: 28:17

Are we though?

Robb (: 28:40

You know, see whatever you want. Like, I've never been to Hawaii. I want to go at least one time. My son's been twice. Yeah, so I've never been. I've been to Cancun twice though, which is very cool. So I've done... Cancun was nice. My one of my best friends just went. He... I think he's back now. He's back. Yeah, he... he... he went and I'm assuming for his anniversary because that's coming up.

Tina (: 28:46

You to. I've been four times.

Tina (: 28:53

I've only been once to there. Yeah.

Tina (: 29:02

Nice.

Robb (: 29:07

So maybe they went early. But I'd like to do Hawaii once and there's a couple of states in the south I really want to go to. I want to go to Tennessee and I'd like to go to South Carolina. But that's really it. I'd like to go to Ireland but flying overseas is still kind of a scary thing to me. I and I think might get worse over the next four years. You know flying. I think just flying overseas. So you know

Tina (: 29:31

Do you think so? In Ireland?

Robb (: 29:37

Because you have to land in other countries that might not be conducive, right? Like to go to Ireland you have to at least go from New York to England and just I just think with with the You know, there may be terrorism on the rise going across the two other countries. So which is scary to me

Not that it's Ireland that's scary, I just think that flying overseas might be a scary thing. Like my boy, he wants to go to Japan like really bad. And I'm like, okay, I mean, and I know you have to from there, I think you have to go from LA to Hawaii, then to Japan, I think. So it's just that kind of thing. But I think that, yes, there's a few small things I would like to do before I drop dead. Hawaii would be one of them.

So I think that's something I'll do at some point. Let's say the other thing is like I don't want to travel alone. I think traveling alone is just not for me. I'd at least want to share it with somebody so I might have to wait a little longer. But I think that those are a couple of things I'd like to do. Besides that, I'm okay with doing things within where I'm at on a very small basis.

I think weekend getaways are just as good to your mental health. Because I think that our mental health, that could be a whole other thing we could talk about on a show, is at an all time high for every age group. think that, I think it's definitely more in Gen X and lower. I think boomers just, they're just a tougher grit.

You know, they're just different. They're built. They do, but I think, but I think for different reasons, I think a lot of, I think a lot of boomers have depression because they've lost the love of their life. And they, and they didn't know how to deal with that.

Tina (: 31:27

They still suffer from depression though for sure. I know my dad does. Yeah.

Robb (: 31:43

and that's their depression and look there are that's what i mean

Tina (: 31:44

Well, think that boomers don't know how to deal emotionally with anything because they were told to just suck it up. They weren't given the opportunity to try to fix what has bothered them. that's, I think that that's more what it is. Cause they're a tough generation. But they've suffered.

Robb (: 32:10

For sure. They're different. They did suffer. And mostly like people like your dad who like went to Vietnam and went through other things without a doubt. I'm lucky. My dad did the military. He did the military before they were ever in Vietnam. He joined when he was 17 and did his four years. So he never had to go. He had already done his time. Yeah, I might not be here. Who knows?

Tina (: 32:14

Yeah.

Tina (: 32:34

That's good.

Yeah.

Robb (: 32:39

I think that there's definitely a, we were told the same, think though, you know, because look, the boomers are our parents. So I think there was a lot to us being told to suck it up. And I think that, but I think we are also from the generation of seeing mental health problems, right?

So I think that there's a lot to that. I think the generation after us though, geared up way too much that everyone's got a fucking mental health problem. So I, yeah, it's like, look, the generation after us or the is the pill generation, just give them something to cope like, that also can't be the answer. You know, I don't want, I also don't want to be popped up on something, you know,

Tina (: 33:16

Right? Everybody gets a diagnosis.

Tina (: 33:24

Yeah.

Robb (: 33:36

just because there are people out there that have, you know, what is ADHD and, there's, and there's drugs that help them. I know, I know people who their kids need it and it helps them, which I think is awesome. But I also think that you should be very much diagnosed before they just started giving everything in it. And I think that that, that definitely hurt that next generation after us. The millennial generation is definitely like,

has to stay home having mental health days instead of sucking it up and going to work or quitting their jobs for no reason.

Tina (: 34:11

Yeah, I don't You know an ADHD is one of those things. I know my godson had it I know a guy that I dated it had it actually you know a few guys that I dated had it But you know what they they medicated them when I don't think that that was What they needed because it calmed to them their body, but it didn't calm their mind They needed to run they needed to be like

They needed to exhaust some of that energy so they could focus. And I know the ones that really got into like specifically running or being very physical, they've done really well by their ADHD because it drove them. But man, I watched my little godson.

Robb (: 34:56

Mm-hmm.

Tina (: 35:02

Remember him going to a family party and he literally sat on the edge of a planter and he just looked miserably tired all the time and I went to his parents I said you get him off that shit now Because this is child abuse a child that's happy and running around that's normal this this kid That's like a little walking zombie. That's not right. That's not normal He's way over medicated and this kid drove everybody crazy because he had so much energy

I ran the shit out of him. I ran him until he could not move anymore And then he would sit still at a table and spend time with me for hours He just needed to expel the energy. So I don't know even the way they did that was fucked up

Robb (: 35:42

Right. Right. Yeah, and and look, I agree with you that I think that our generation, like we have depression issues and I think that

We probably didn't see them early in our life because we were either told to suck it up or we just did. And that was just how we were raised. And we went, I've, I've seen more of how I feel in my forties, like that I could see like, man, I'm not doing well or, and, trying to cope differently instead of, you know,

Pills, I don't that's just not my thing and trying to just reasonably see things differently But you know, I mean I think that going forward our generation again is probably going to be hit harder with depression when that Retirement shit does come up where we're going to realize like I'm not going to be able to

not get up and go to work every day. I'm gonna be stuck in this circle or, you know, I just, can't save enough or whatever it is. It's just a scary thought to me. Where I'm at, it's sucky because like, look, all of us would love to not work and enjoy life, you know, and, but even that, who knows what that's going to be. You know, you might just be stuck at home, you know, in, and

having enough to live, but not having enough to enjoy. And whatever that is, guess, whatever your thing of enjoyment is. But I don't know. I think that there's just a lot going on with everyone in life between money struggles are huge right now for everyone. Everyone I know is is having money struggles. All of them. Even the people who are who were doing very well, I think that

Robb (: 37:48

Everything else is now, shit. Like, and, I'm in a business of, of, you know, luxury. It's a luxury item. What I, you know, sell. So, you know, our business is down and it's down by a lot. So it's, it's a scary thought where, you know, what am I going to do if, if, they start laying people off, like, where am I going to go?

I have a fallback thankfully because of what I did before. I could always go back to being a technician and doing that but I probably won't get paid when I get paid now so I'll definitely be I'll be stressed out over that as well. And look the the rate of suicides now is crazy. One in four men commit suicide. Yeah. One in four.

Tina (: 38:43

What?

Robb (: 38:48

Crazy. Now that, I don't believe so, but I'll look it up.

Tina (: 38:50

That's gotta be wrong.

Tina (: 38:56

So the average age of a man living in California is 76, but the average that's the life expectancy, I should say. Well, the overall average life expectancy for Californians is 79. So. Definitely women are living longer than men, but so technically, if we go by this, we need to have enough money to last until we're about 80.

Robb (: 39:05

Yeah. Yeah. That's crazy. Wow.

Tina (: 39:31

you

Robb (: 39:34

I'm trying to find the actual. So I don't know if it's going to tell me the actual one in numbers, but this is as of 2021. 48,000 people killed themselves in 2021. It the suicide rate among men was almost four times higher than women.

Tina (: 39:35

Well, if think about it, the age we are versus what we need to be... Interesting.

Robb (: 40:04

We make up 50 % of the population nearly and we comprise of 80 % of the suicides. Men do. For men suicide rates are highest among those ages 75 and older. So if you make it to 75, you're more likely to probably kill yourself. That's awesome. Let's see suicide rate among adolescents and young adults is lower than the suicide rate of older age groups. So

ow about women. Let's see, in: 2022

Tina (: 40:45

it's got both of us. Great.

Robb (: 41:00

African American lowest and Eastern Mediterranean. Yeah, so it doesn't have the, I could have sworn it was one in four, but I could be, it might, but even if it's one in 10, I mean, that's still, that's a very high percentage of that. It's scary that, you know.

Tina (: 41:16

It's still high, yeah.

Robb (: 41:25

I just think now the suicide rate among people is probably very high. know, like it's much easier to get out of your issues when, you know, there's a way out. I couldn't, you know, I guess, I mean, we could all do it. I just wouldn't use a gun. That's just not my way to go. That's just a horrible thing. But yeah, it's scary. mean.

Tina (: 41:49

It's all horrible when somebody feels so distraught that they have to take their own life. Doesn't matter how they do it, it's horrible.

Robb (: 41:58

Yeah, no, I agree. I mean, I just think that that I just couldn't do it mostly because I'm a gun guy and I would hate to be a statistic. But I just think that, you know, we're we start looking towards whatever this future is for us at our age because like we're you know, we're above 50. So

Supposedly we still have at least 10 years or 16 years of, of working. And, I, just, I'm doing my best to look at life in the, I, I, like I said last week, I live now, you know, live now. We, we do so many things daily that could take our life. We drive in a car for, you know, I mean, I drive for at least two hours.

Tina (: 42:23

20 years.

Tina (: 42:47

extended amounts of time.

Robb (: 42:48

The funny thing is, is I drive for two hours and I'm less likely to die in a car accident than someone who drives four blocks, statistically speaking. You know, you're more apt to die within three blocks of your house than you are traveling far. It's just a scary thought. just want to, you know, I thought, man, we're putting all this money into something that we may, for one, never use, you know, and then

My kid's going to get taxed on a bunch of fucking money that, you know, he's going to he's going to have to pay the the the taxes or the fees to get my money if I do die. I just I'm trying to live for the now, you know, there's so many good things and good people around us that. That are are they could make us and not happy, but at least make our life more fulfilling. I think that's the other thing, you know, like we've talked about relationships on here a ton of times, and it's like.

you know, you could get in this relationship. Is it going to make you happy? Probably not, but it might. It's going to make it more fulfilling. Like, you know, I mean, getting in a relationship is not is not going to make you happy. Matter of fact, it could bring you, you know, bad things, but it's definitely more fulfilling than being alone. At least that's how I look at it. And if you're going to spend time with people and we are, you know, the community living is coming. We're all going to be roommates with each other or some kind of shit, or at least being a

Tina (: 44:13

you

Robb (: 44:16

assisted living facility with a bunch of people that are, you I just, man, just live a little bit because, know, there's so many bad things going on in life. And, you know, I've, I was just sent something today about, three days of darkness. And if you're, you know, if you're not into religion and look, I wasn't for, you know, for a shit ton of time. And my belief in God is, is great. But this guy was talking about

three days of darkness and how God is going to send people to your door as family members, but they're just demons. And I think that there's a, like, there's a lot of that in regular life. The people that are sent to us are already don't have something good for us. They're just, they're just bad and they're looking to take advantage of you and shit on you and really be bad people in your life. And I've seen it with friends who have been with shitty people and

Look, you know, go out there and be good to the people that are good to you. if, whatever it is that they are in your life, take advantage of that. They're good people. Take advantage of it. Cause we're going to be in these times where we're, we're going to be struggling after a certain amount of time in our life. And hopefully we all can retire, but I don't see it coming. At least not in my future and a lot of other people's.

Just man just take time to like we said last week take time to the people that are good in your life and and hopefully they're all there There's something that you can lean on and and tell people that you love them in your life because man it's I'm I'm you know I see it coming with my my dad you know I already lost my mom like you

I know how long do I do we have left with our parents and our siblings and our best friends? Like one of my best friends is I've been you know same with you 40 years you know he was he's I I just saw something that said you know if you're lucky if you have somebody that you met in seventh grade and they're still your friend and I met him in sixth grade and we still were in a group text I still talked to him I haven't seen him as much as I want and I kind of need to do that he's only

Tina (: 46:18

Yeah.

Robb (: 46:35

an hour away from me, hour and something, and I should probably see him more. But yeah, just, man, it's difficult when you have these people that are so close to you and we're gonna lose them, all of them. Or they're gonna lose us. It's true though, like, well, you know, it's so funny, because I saw something, not funny, but I saw,

Tina (: 46:51

Well that's morbid. mean, maybe you'll go first and you won't lose any of them. You know?

Robb (: 47:02

a thing saying about your partner as you get older and and most men they've they they talked to said they hope that their wife dies first so she doesn't have to go through the pain and i thought that that was such a a telling sign of what a lot of men you know they don't they don't want their their spouse to ever go through anything bad so

because if you know if the man died first they have to go through all that pain and no man wants to see their their significant other go through it and I thought that that was such a poignant little no no but what it is is that in their own head is you know I hope that I that my the their lady in their life goes first so she doesn't have to deal with the pain of seeing their the other their man die I don't know I just thought it was kind of a nice little

Tina (: 47:39

But they wouldn't see it, they'd be dead.

Robb (: 47:57

You know way of like, know, man, they're I think we're just built, you know, we're thankfully we're built different both men and women You know, even even in in death the man is still trying to protect his His lady like I hope you don't have to you know, go through me dying. I thought it was kind of a Cute little thing of how we're just so different It's how we're how we're together is interesting how we how we stay, you know

together as men and women, because we are so different. The Mars and Venus thing sometimes just gets me that it's so true. If you haven't read that book, it's really good. Have you ever read it, Tina? The men are from Mars, women are from Venus. Oh, forever ago. Yeah. I read it literally after my ex-wife left me. And I remember underlining things in it that I thought were me.

Tina (: 48:36

I did. That was a long, I don't know that I remember so much of it, but that book came out like in high school. I remember it coming out and I read it.

Robb (: 48:55

Like, and at the end of that book, had so many red lines under it. I was like, shit, maybe, maybe I am part of the problem. So I agree. Both sides are part of the problem, which is I think as soon as you realize that is how relationships actually get better. When you both realize you're the problem.

Tina (: 48:55

huh.

Tina (: 49:03

If we're in a relationship, we are definitely part of the problem. Yeah.

Tina (: 49:15

Yeah. You know, it's funny is, my ex and I are extremely different people. He is by far the most, one of the most technical people I've ever met. And I, by far, is probably one of the more artistic people I've ever met. And if, if there was a way to do things different, it was definitely the way we were. And,

Robb (: 49:17

You

Tina (: 49:41

It was hard living in that situation for him and for me, but because we did blow up our friendship, because we worked so hard to keep that and it took more work that I care to admit. But now I look at, I look at how we are together and we get along so well and we've found a ways to bridge the gap that, that

Robb (: 50:04

Right.

Tina (: 50:11

You know it's not him.

it looking at how we, I, where was I going with this? Looking at where we were.

and where we are now, like we found a way to do it. And we found a way to be there for each other and to to be friends after all of that. Where was I going with this, though, Rob? was it? What did you say right before this? I lost my train of thought.

Robb (: 50:42

just that we're so different and we find ways to actually coexist, even though men and different, we're just different creatures. And I think that we drive each other to, know,

craziness sometimes and but we we fit like a glove we are yin and yang i i'm gonna play something right here hopefully it'll play because it's finish it

Tina (: 50:59

Mm-hmm.

Tina (: 51:04

Yeah.

Well, let me let me finish what I was saying, though. Now we have found a way to coexist and to be friends. And he even went to my birthday party yesterday and he said to me, goes, I'm glad we did the work to bridge the gap, even if we couldn't do it in marriage. We've done we've done it definitely in divorce. And I think that people we just need to learn how to tolerate each other and learn how to bridge the gap instead of.

instead of magnifying the differences that we have in making the gap an ocean. You know what I mean? Making it harder to cross. doesn't have to be that bad.

Robb (: 51:44

Mm-hmm, for sure.

I saw something on Instagram and I'm gonna play it and I it's kind of what we're talking about right now But I thought this was very interesting point of view and probably very true. Let me see if it'll play The distinguishing factor of couples that make it and the couples that don't are Are you friends? have to have common interest in art in listen to the same music at the same turn-ons and turn-offs agree on communication Agree soup to nuts on religion

So I thought it was kind of interesting thing is like the guy was saying goes, you don't have to agree on almost anything except you have to be friends. And I think that that should be the base of everything. It's funny how we started with retirement, but we end with this. I just think that, you know, as we get older, we need to look at the reality of life and death.

Tina (: 52:35

you

Robb (: 52:45

and the things that are happening around us. I think I'm going to really kind of lean in on my son a little bit more going forward to start looking at life in a much deeper, deeper thing. Cause I don't think I did enough of that. But yeah, this, you know, I hope that all of us have a chance to not work and, have something to lean back on because man, it's

It's a depressing thought to think that that we might have to work until we just go to sleep one night and not wake up. I don't know. I hope not. you know, and I know you're going through a bunch that I'm sure we'll talk about at some point on here because everything is comes out when we when we happen to get in front of microphones. But, anything you want to say?

Tina (: 53:35

He he.

Robb (: 53:40

Now that we're at end of this. Yeah, I agree.

Tina (: 53:44

Yeah, I guess it all goes back to find your happy and be happy now while you can doing whatever it is that you want to do. I would say make concessions to take care of yourself in the future, but don't worry so much about it because it's not here yet.

Robb (: 54:05

The the past is the past and the future hasn't happened yet live here and and like you said make concessions put some money away But don't I don't think you should make it your your life's goal try to live now because and It can be a snap of a finger and everything changes So Alrighty make sure you check us out on the social medias because I'm posting more and actually it's working

And you can check us out pretty much anywhere. can listen to podcasts. Apple and Spotify seem to be the top earners because, well, they're the easiest to have. yeah, share because a lot of people have been sharing because we've been getting things from all over the place again, all over. And yeah, it's an opinion show. Don't get it twisted. Keep coming back every Wednesday for Tina. I'm Rob. We'll see you in a week. Bye.

Tina (: 55:01

See ya.